


The future

by TheLadyConstellation



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: BOXES, Bucky Barnes Has Panic Attacks, Domestic Avengers, Engagment, Fluffy Ending, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, Moving In Together, Panic Attacks, Stucky - Freeform, oh so many boxes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-02
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2020-10-05 23:49:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 25,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20497394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLadyConstellation/pseuds/TheLadyConstellation
Summary: Steve and Bucky have been through a lot. But they are in a need of a break, well less of a break and more of a new beginning. A new beginning that starts with a Brooklyn apartment and lots of boxes. There are many bumps in the road, in Steve's opinion there are so many bumps in the road that it is nearly unpaved. But they are with each other to the end of the line, the line that has taken them to the future.





	1. unu

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing on this site, so I hope anyone who is reading this enjoys it. Here are some notes that may come in handy. 
> 
> -Bucky's height does not represent Sebastian's height, he is multiple inches shorter. This is for storytelling purposes.  
\- Infinity War did happen but they managed to get the gauntlet off of him and Nebula killed him.  
\- Even though Endgame never happened, Tony and Pepper did leave the city to go to a cabin upstate that they stay at most of the time.  
-Bucky is fluent in Romanian because of his past as both Bucky and Winter Soldier  
-I based most of the timeline (with few exceptions) off of this one from The Life of Bucky Barns Instagram and Tumblr, https://www.sutori.com/story/the-life-of-bucky-barnes-timeline--7zcFNmBMYM1c6p1St15Rng6C  
-For this fic, if using the timeline as a reference I am creating my own present day, but feel free to look at the past.

“Good morning darling” Bucky whispered into the ear of the man lying next to him. His hand rubbed Steve’s chest up and down. The man rolled over, catching Bucky’s morning lips in a kiss. Bucky was surprised at this, for some reason or another. Mainly, that this was the first time in a long time that they could do this. Last night was the first night in their new apartment. A brownstone in Brooklyn, a quaint home for two. Steve implies that there are three living here, because of Toby. 

The bed was one of the only pieces of furniture in this apartment. Other than a nightstand and a couch, the entire apartment was covered in moving boxes plastered with the logo of Stark Industries. Steve insisted that without all of his robots carrying the boxes it would have gone much faster, with the two men being able to carry at least a dozen boxes at a time. 

“Good morning” Steve mumbled, almost inaudible. If you ask Bucky for one surprising thing about their relationship is that Steve isn’t a morning person. It takes him at least a cup of coffee to wake up, or what Bucky calls the ‘natural’ way of waking him up. 

“We’ll have to tell Stark that the new bed is wonderful,” Bucky said. Tony gave them this king-sized bed as a ‘thanks for moving out of my house’ gift. 

“But we haven’t even broken it in yet.” Steve groaned. Bucky chuckled at this. Steve stretched his arms out and wrapped them around Bucky like he was a big teddy bear. 

“I wuv you so much Boobear,” Steve said, acting like a toddler. I mean, it’s hard for him to not act like a toddler with him literally wrapped around him like a child around a teddy bear. 

“I love you too Stevie.” Bucky kissed his cheek, leaving a little kitten lick before rolling over and out of bed. Steve, of course, made grabby hands and whimpered like a child. 

“I know Stevie, but we have to get up. Everyone is coming over to unpack. Tony, Bruce, and despite my best wishes Peter and Scott. Plus like everyone else we know. We have to get up.” He took his boyfriend’s hand and led him out of bed. Once Steve was out of bed though, he rose above Bucky. Steve being 6’2 and Bucky a 5’11 not to mention the muscles on Steve, making him a skyscraper and Bucky a slightly smaller skyscraper. 

“I guess I’ll get out of bed.” Steve groaned, kissing Bucky. The dark-haired man just smiled and walked to the bathroom. Steve stood there idle, blushing like a young girl. 

“STEVE WHERE THE HELL IS MY HAIRBRUSH.” A yell came from the bathroom. He laughed and looked around the room, the array of boxes confusing to him. He spotted one in the farthest corner of the room labeled, ‘Bucky’s beauty supplies.’ He grabbed the box and took it into the ensuite bathroom. He slammed it onto the counter and started digging through all of the things that he mainly used in Wakanda because in his words, ‘when you’re under the ice that long your hair will need a lot of blow drys to get to the way it used to be.’ He dug through the box of old combs, some used boxes of hair dye, blow dryers, and flat irons until he found Bucky’s favorite hairbrush. 

“Your sword my liege,” Steve said as he presented his boyfriend with a hairbrush. Bucky smiled and low smile and brushed out his hair. Steve stood behind him and played with his hair. 

“Dear we have to get dressed,” Bucky said looking at Steve’s body up and down. He put the box on the floor and entered the bedroom again to find some clothes. Looking around the bedroom, Bucky was the first to find a box of clothes. The downside to this was that the box was full of Steve’s button-downs. He sighed and threw one at Steve. He laughed and put it on whilst looking for Bucky’s solid color shirts. He failed of course and Bucky found the box full of solid black shirts. He pulled one on along with a standard pair of jeans. He turned around and somehow Steve had managed to get completely dressed, comb his hair, and get shaving cream on his face. 

“Do you want some?” Steve said, shaking the bottle. 

“That would be a no,” Bucky replied, stroking his beard. He was proud of it, along with his hair. It took him a while to grow it out. In a way, it’s like a security blanket. Not to mention the fact that Steve enjoys playing with it, maybe a bit too much. Steve grabbed his safety razor and began to shave his face, this little bit of overnight stubble washed away. Bucky actually preferred him this way, clean-shaven that is. One of the things that he has learned after starting a life with him.

The darker haired man took this time to begin the unpacking business. After getting the clothing out of the boxes he realized that they didn’t have a dresser. He laughed at his stupidity, leaving the folded clothes on the floor. After he did this he made what Steve would have called a ‘dire mistake.’ Everything was covered in boxes of all sizes. The living room did have a couch, but it was like everything else covered in boxes. 

“Hey, Wolf boy let us in.” Sam’s sassy voice echoed through the electronic doorbell that Stark installed for them. Bucky laughed and buzzed Sam in. The sound of multiple sets of footsteps up their stairs was almost unbearable. The door opened and everyone they knew flooded in. Bucky’s first thought was that there wouldn’t be enough room in the entire apartment for them all. The first to come in was Nat who looked around and just said, “this place is a dump.” She was kind of right.

“Well, that’s why you’re here. Steve is in the bathroom.” The rest of them came in. Well except for Thor and Loki, but they were off in New Asgard with Valkairye. There was no need for them to come all this way just to help me and Steve move in. 

“How’s the apartment wolfman?” Sam asked putting his hand on Bucky’s metal shoulder. He flinched. 

“It’s quite nice, especially the bed.” Tony made a gagging noise behind him. 

“Hey Stark, don’t insult my love life in my own house,” Steve shouted from the bedroom door. He came out into the open space and greeted the people who came to help them move in. 

“Thanks for coming guys, so I guess we should get started.” They all agreed and began on the boxes stacked on the couch. A couple of wordless looks across the room made Peter sigh and hold out his arms for boxes upon boxes to be stacked in his arms. The greatest asset to a moving day is a 15-year-old with super strength. He was also an amazing help in assembling the furniture. 

“Cmon juice box, hurry up on that coffee table!” Sam yelled to Peter who was assembling an Ikea coffee table that not even Thor could pronounce the name of. He finished it and made a motion, showing off the coffee table to them. Tony gave him a thumbs up for reassurance. He is just a kid after all, and Tony is basically his dad now. 

  
  


After several hours of working the apartment was coming together. Almost every box was gone and almost every piece of furniture was assembled. And Bucky was sitting in the bathtub, shaking back and forth. This has happened every so often since they had to leave Wakanda a year and a half ago. Steve hasn’t found him. Everyone was in the kitchen drinking, except for Peter who was enjoying a nice cold lemonade that Clint may or may not have slipped some Vodka into. But they would never know for sure, well except for Clint and maybe Nat. 

Steve was leaning against the kitchen island, sipping on some white wine. He was smiling to himself, not only because of all the work they got done this morning but because of how well Bucky was doing. They hadn’t had an incident in a while and he hasn’t had any trigger incidents either. He was recovering solidly. Not just mentally but physically, he hasn’t had an incident on that front either. No need to go back under ice or have an operation. He looked around and couldn’t find Bucky. A dark thought came to his mind, one that contradicted the ones that he was just having. What if he is having another panic attack or worse…

  
  


He pushed himself away from the island and dragged himself to the washroom. He saw the shower curtain closed. Steve drew a long breath and pulled back the curtain gently. He saw the man curled up like a scared child, which wasn’t a terrible way to describe how he was. 

“Bucky, it’s me Steve” He got in the bathtub at the opposite end that Bucky was on. He learned that sometimes Bucky wants some distance. Bucky nodded, acknowledging that Steve was there.

“Can you tell me where you are?” Steve said, in his most gentle voice. Like he was talking to someone very young and very scared.

“In our apartment.” That was good, Steve thought. When he has panic attacks he usually doesn’t even know where he is, or he thinks that he is back in Berlin or Russia. 

“That’s good sweetie, do you want to do some breathing with me?” He nods, unable to speak. Steve makes a motion up for 10 seconds, both of them breathing in and holding it. Then he brings his hand back down. When they’re doing this Steve notices that Bucky turned on the holographic arm. The one that Tony and Bruce made. It’s one of the things he does when he’s like this, he tries to forget. 

“Good job Bucky,” Steve said after they did ten sets of their breathing exercises.

“Thank...You.” Bucky said, shifting. Steve held out his arms.

“Do you want to come here?” He said. Bucky nodded and moved himself to Steve’s arms. Steve closed his arms around him. The dark-haired man’s face buried itself in Steve’s shoulder. 

“I’m sorry Steve.”   
  


“There is nothing to be sorry for,” Steve said before kissing Bucky’s forehead multiple times. At some point when Steve was with his boyfriend Natasha realized that they were both gone, her first assumption isn’t too PG. But when she started looking for him she ended up at the door to their bathroom. To be completely honest she thought she would hear filthy noises, but was somewhat shocked to hear calm shushing. She knocked on the door, opening it without an answer. 

“You guys okay in here?” She said, looking at the boys cuddling in the tub. When she spoke Bucky flinched. Natasha felt absolutely terrible for this. Steve combed through Bucky’s hair and kissed it, not afraid of Nat seeing them affectionate. She was one of the only other friends to see Bucky like this because she worked at Shield as well. She saw him after he surrendered to SHIELD when King T’Challa deemed him well enough to leave Wakanda. The first time Steve saw him after Bucky got off the ice again was in a SHIELD facility. Bucky truly didn’t want to see him, with the state that he was in. He had been through a lot in those 48 hours, with no sleep. He was in a whole new environment, an industrial one. He was just in a hospital gown and boxers, awaiting a full medical and psychological evaluation. If it wasn’t leaving Wakanda that took it out of him, it was the hours and hours of tests and doctors coming in and out. It wasn’t until two whole sleepless days later that Steve was finally allowed in. The reunion was something for romance novels if you are reading one where the dark-haired love interest hasn’t slept in 48 hours, has one intact arm, and is in deep psychological pain. And in Steve’s time, he has yet to read one romance novel like this. They instantly connected, Steve almost lifting the other off the ground, kissing like there was no one in the room. Because if they cared to look around they would have realized that there was no one in the room. 

“We’re...Okay” Bucky said softly, in the quietest voice. Just being able to speak again. Steve kissed the crown of his head again, something that never failed to calm Bucky down. 

“Well that’s wonderful, see we were having drinks and I turned around and you were both gone. I wondered first if you had gone off the break in the new bed, but found you in here.” She sat down next to the tub, talking to the boys. 

  
“SHIELD is happy that you are both getting settled in a place of your own.” She said changing the topic after she brought up one of the boxes that they found containing some unmentionable items. But she wasn’t wrong, and SHIELD weren’t the only ones ready for Steve and Bucky to get a place of their own. Tony was ready for them to move out, but for a while, that wasn’t an option. Bucky wasn’t safe on his own yet. And neither was Steve. Some thought that he and Bucky were heinous criminals and God knows what they would do to him. It was for their safety, and Tony and Pepper’s house was just the place that they needed. They had one of the most secure houses in America. And of course they had some extra bedrooms, but Tony knew they would only need one. They stayed there for quite some time, multiple months actually. It never really got to Pepper, but Tony really didn’t like Bucky. As many times as Steve told him that the man who Tony didn’t like was the Winter Soldier, and that was not who was staying at their Cabin. Tony couldn't stop seeing the face of the man who killed his parents. 

“And we’re happy to have a place of our own now too,” Steve said, and for the first time since this morning, Bucky smiled. This made Steve happy as well, because when Bucky is sad, as is he. 

“Hey Buck, do you think that you can join us for some drinks?” Steve said asking with his hands if he could pick him up. Bucky nodded, wrapping his arms around Steve. The blond super soldier picked him up, standing him up outside the bathtub. Bucky leaned in for a little kiss on the cheek, his trademark with Steve. It has to be, he’s been giving Steve those kisses since 1938. 

“Shall we leave this bathroom and have some wine?” Steve said in a phony British accent that would make Peggy Carter cry. Bucky smiled a weak smile and left the bathroom with his hand interlocked with Steve’s. When they came back in the living room they guys were sitting at the dining room table, playing UNO. 

“Well, there you are. We were thinking about getting a glass to hear into the bedroom.” Tony said.

“But Peter told me that it was nasty and we should leave you alone.” He said with a smile, nudging the curly boy next to him.

“DRAW FOUR FALCON MAN,” Peter shouted, causing Bucky to flinch and turn into Steve. Steve shushed him and tried his hardest to calm him down. Loud noises made him panic when he was already in a panicky state. 

“Hey, can you not yell, I know that Uno gets you riled up but for Bucky can you not yell?” Steve said in a calm voice. 

“I’m sorry Mr. Barnes I didn’t mean to yell,” Peter said. Bucky sat down next to them. Steve realized something very important at this moment, Bucky has never played Uno. He stared at the cards with a set of confusion. 

“It’s fine.” He said with his voice still confused. 

“Mr. Barnes, do you not know how to play Uno?” Peter said, riddled with sadness. Bucky shook his head. Peter’s hand flew to his mouth. “How could you have grown up without Uno?” Peter said again. 

“I’m sorry to say this but I was born 1917 and Uno didn’t come out until far later.” Steve smiled at his boyfriend who was making full sentences again. 

“Well, we have to teach you how to play.” He collected the cards and shuffled them. He passed them around to Tony, Sam, Bruce, himself, and Bucky. He flipped the first card over.

“So the first card is red 1 so if you have any red cards or any ones you can play them.” He pointed to Bucky’s cards and then to the one on the top of the pile. 

“Rosu,” Bucky muttered in Romanian. He lived there for so long, trying to remember his past. He is more than fluent now when he was woken up the only language he heard was Romanian. In those sparse memories as himself, he spoke Romanian. And sometimes you can still hear him muttering in it under his breath. This muttering was much louder now. Peter heard it very well and looked to Steve to answer the question of ‘what the heck did Bucky just say?’

“Red” Steve mouthed, not speaking a word but overaccentuating his word. Peter nodded and continued on with the game. Bucky placed down a red card with his true hand, it was shaking like he has had a few too many when he hasn’t had a sip. Peter praised him, sam rolled his eyes, and they continued on with the game. 

“And when you only have one card left you yell uno!” Peter said.

“Why uno? If you only have one card left you should yell unu. That means one, not unO.” Steve laughed, coming behind Bucky to rub his shoulders. 

“Dear, Uno means one in Spanish, unu is Romanian.” Steve laughed, as did Bucky when this finally hit him. 

“Silly me, not understanding things again.” He played another card. Steve nudged him. Bucky looked down to his cards and his eyes lit up. He showed it to Steve right before shouting,

  
“UNO!”   



	2. doi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve goes through one of his episodes, hoping to spend the rest of the day in bed with Bucky. But a meeting with the avengers sticks a wedge in their plans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm Back! I didn't expect people to actually read that last part. Thanks for everything. Now onto notes. 
> 
> -There's an event here that isn't in the timeline or the canon, but it explains well
> 
> -The reason they go to Avengers tower is for meetings and if they aren't at the compound, also at this time the compound is under maintenance
> 
> -Two special someones make appearances in this...

“BUCKY! NO!” Steve thrashed in his sleep, yelling the name of the man who was sleeping right next to him. This was happening far more often, remembering all of the events leading up to where they are now. Bucky has fewer terrors at night and more in the day. He will be standing and collapse to the ground, remembering slivers of his past as the Winter Soldier. He remembered them on the helipad, him about to kill Steve. That was the first time he was Bucky in a very long time. When he looked at Steve and saw Steve Rodgers and not ‘your target.’

Steve continued to thrash about, it took a bit of time before Bucky woke up. When he did he saw Steve yelling his name and crying, sweating. Bucky touched his shoulder and shouted his name.

“STEVE WAKE UP!” Bucky used his flesh hand to attempt to shake him awake but to no avail. “PLEASE, WAKE UP.” He tried yelling again. Still, Steve threw himself about the bed while his nightmare terrors him. It distresses Bucky to no end when Steve is like this. He did not want to resort to something like this, but he fiddled with his metal arm, took a deep breath and placed it on his forearm. It sent a small electric shock through his body, waking him up.

His eyes flashed open, the pupils dilated. Bucky used his other hand to wipe the sweat off of Steve’s forehead. He was hyperventilating.

“Bucky ...Buck…” He muttered out. Bucky shushed him and stroked his sweaty hair. He kissed his forehead.

“It’s okay...It’s okay. You don’t have to say anything.” Bucky whispered sweet nothings into Steve’s ear. He curled into Bucky’s chest, sobbing. The dreams, in Bucky’s experience, were usually about the days when Steve believed that Bucky was dead. The image of Bucky falling from the cliff will occasionally come playing in his mind. The other was far worse. If anything can be worse than replaying the image of the love of your life falling to his presumed death. He was dreaming of all the times he almost lost him. He was remembering when he found that Bucky was alive, but had no recollection of him. He remembered when Bucky was on trial and the death sentence was proposed. That one got both of them. There was not one entity prosecuting The Winter Soldier, but entire governments. When one prosecutor told the people of the court that, “this man took lives, and taking his is a gift at the hands of the American Government.” When these words were spoken, not just Steve but Bucky as well began to cry. They aren’t out as a couple, even now. But no one batted an eye when he held his hand under the table and sobbed.

But his dream was of the worst moment of his life. When he and SHIELD attempted to break Bucky out of a HYDRA facility. Bucky was in the hands of SHIELD for a little bit in 2014, but he was quickly kidnapped by HYDRA once again. They began torturing him. Steve insisted that they had to rescue him if there was any hope. They infiltrated the base, finding Bucky strapped to a table, being electrocuted in multiple places. They had whipped him cut him. When Steve and a small group of SHIELD agents, or what was left, entered they saw a bone saw as well. One of the people in the room, torturing him yelled what he found out was ‘this is what happens when you fail a mission.’ They killed the torturers and broke Bucky out, sedating him. This took a long time though. They had to fight off the guards. They had to keep Bucky from killing him because he was still a 90 percent winter soldier. It felt so real.

“Bucky! We’re here to get you. We are here to take you home.” Bucky doesn’t remember this of course. But when they managed to get him out he took off. He ran, on foot away from the agents. He was so terrified, so he ran and made it all the way to Bucharest.

“It was about…Kaliningrad.” Steve stuttered out. Bucky just held him tighter. Even if he didn’t remember it, he heard all of the stories from SHIELD and Steve.

“I’m really sorry Steve.” He kissed him again. He whispered into his ear that it would be okay, sweet nothings coming out of his lips.

“I think I’m okay...Sorry for ruining our first morning in an unpacked apartment.” Bucky told him that it was fine and rolled him and Steve out of bed.

“Does a nice warm bath suit your fancy?” Steve smiled for the first time this morning, gazing at his boyfriend. A nice warm bath did seem perfect to Steve. He nodded and Bucky immediately picked him up and carried him to the bathroom. He turned on the bathtub to a perfectly warm temperature and poured in bubbles. Bucky loves the bubbles but hates to admit it. He picked Steve up again and put him in the bathtub along with himself. Steve was practically lying in his lap. Bucky grabbed a little toy shaped like Captain America. A terrible depiction, of course, but Steve loved it. The little bath toy shot water out of the shield. It was one of the first tackey merchandise pieces that Natasha bought him. With many more on the way.

“No matter what we have been through, or what you have done, or what I have done. I still love you.” Bucky said, kissing his cheek. Steve continued playing with the bath toy. Bucky grabbed two more toys, their favorites. After the war on Thanos, children were looking up to the Avengers more than ever. This, of course, was an opportunity for toy companies to make a penny. And from this came Captain America and White Wolf ducks. Natasha had to give them to the boys for Christmas. And Bucky loved it.

“The bath is warm,” Steve said. He reached around and grabbed the shampoo, scrubbing it into Bucky’s hair. He closed his eyes and focused on the feeling of his boyfriend rubbing the shampoo into his hair. Steve loved doing this, just the little things for Bucky. And Bucky felt the same way, starting to rub soap down Steve’s back. This was one of their favorite things to do as a couple. There was no sex, no heated make outs, and no bites. It was just love, and that was all they needed.

“Are you feeling better my love?” Bucky whispered in his ear.

“I am, thank you so much. How are you feeling?”

“Yesterday wasn’t the greatest, but I think I’ll be fine,” Bucky replied, he continued rubbing soap onto Steve’s back and chest.

“You are so beautiful,” Bucky whispered. Steve blushed. Bucky was telling the truth, Steve was so beautiful to him. Seeing him so vulnerable and in the way that only he can see him. Bucky is the only one that can see him like this.

“Are you boys in there!?” A voice yelled, a woman’s voice. She obviously didn’t care about their privacy. Steve was the first to figure out who was outside the door, Natasha. Bucky didn’t realize until right before she opened the door. Steve pressed a finger to Bucky’s lips before diving under the water, hiding his face.

“Steve- Oh hello Bucky. You just have a bath?” He nodded to Natasha.

“Well, I guess I’ll be off then.” She saw bubbles come out of the water.

“Steve are you down there? Nat said. Steve came out of the water, from under Bucky. She laughed.

“Well while I'm here, you left your shield in my car. I left it in the kitchen.” She was blushing like mad. “I’ll be going. Have fun in your bath.” Now Steve was the one blushing. Natasha left the bathroom and Bucky started laughing uncontrollably.

“Oh. My. God.” Bucky was still laughing whilst his boyfriend was dying of embarrassment.

“I still don’t understand why you gave her a key, and more how you forgot your shield of all things!” Steve kissed him on the cheek.

“The waters getting cold.” Steve said, Bucky agreed and picked up the blond man. Steve clinged onto him like a panda to some bamboo.

“I love you. I love you.” The taller man said. Bucky smiled into his cheek before giving it one of his special kisses.

“I love you too.” He carried him back to their room and laid him on the bed.

“We are going to stay in bed all day, doing nothing. All day.” He threw some boxers on the bed.

“In case you want some of these.” Bucky said with a wink. Steve did in fact want some for the time being, he did not do well cold and naked. Bucky was the closest to the way he was back in the forties and then he was naked as much as he could be. That includes this moment. They got under the covers. Bucky grabbed his laptop, a mac pro with a Captain America and the White Wolf ® sticker on the back. Again, the boys love their merch. And if they love anything more than their merch it is their documentaries. And boy does the rest of America love their movies.

“How about Earth’s Greatest Heroes: Captain America, The Falcon, and the White Wolf?” To be completely honest Bucky was kind of partial on the name, but The Winter Soldier was the worst. That name was associated with all of the things that happened in his past. The Winter Soldier was someone else, not him and that was that. He came up with White Wolf in Wakanda. It was the only other name that he was called other than Sergeant Barnes. It started to stick and when they fought Thanos he was the White Wolf. And actually it was kind of a good name.

“Sure.” Steve said. Bucky started the documentary, it started with one of those deep voice overs. With those scripts that could have just been a plaque from a museum.

“Steven Grant Rogers was born on the fourth of July 1918. His father had fought in World War one. At the time they did not know of the permanent damage that the mustard gas had done to his body.” and on and on and on. It was kind of redundant. It went on to briefly describe Bucky’s childhood, how he and Steve grew up together. It didn’t spend too much time on the stuff everyone knew. Then it went on a time jump to when Sam was born, like a long time after Steve and Bucky were ‘alive.’

They were about half way into the doc, around the time after Cap woke up and the Battle of New York. Fascinating stuff if you ask Bucky, since he wasn’t around for that. He doesn't remember but guesses he was in cryo. Their computer stopped playing the video and popped up with a certain A logo that made them both groan. Surprise meeting. Just what they need on their day off. The face of one Tony Stark appeared on their screen, and to every other member of their group of heros.

“Hey sorry for the interruption and I really hope that Steve and Bucky/ Clint and Natasha aren’t having some special time right now, but I need to call a meeting here at Avengers Tower at 12. Be there it’s important, no need to suit up. Not that kind of important.” The message blinked away.

“What if we just don’t go.” Steve whispered into Bucky’s ear. They both knew that wasn’t an option. Stark would literally kill them if they missed a meeting, but they did have two hours before it started.

“Bucky can I ask you something?”

“Anything.” He rested on his elbows, Bucky following suit.

“How do you feel about going public on our relationship.” When Steve said that Bucky wasn’t prepared for what he was going to say.

“I don’t really know… I mean the only people that know are the avengers and SHIELD operatives. It’s really a risk to do that. I don’t know… What do you think.”

“I think that we should be thinking about it. It’s been almost a year since we picked back up again, with both of us conscious. If you add up the time you were in Wakanda it has been more than a year. But no one knows about this. Buck… It’s different than it was in the 40s, some people are still dicks about it but it’s legal for us to kiss or even hold hands in public.”

“Stevie, I think we need to talk about this some other time… I'm not quite ready yet.”

“That’s fine. I just wanted to say something.” He kissed Bucky’s nose, causing the other to cup his metal hand around Steve’s face. Steve kissed down his face and onto the hand. Bucky shivered at the feeling that his hand could feel now. Shuri invented it, or innovated more of her own tech. The sensitivity on his arm was bumped up to ten for most of the day, and the little butterfly kisses felt like heaven to him.

“I love you. I know it’s cheesy.” He whispered while his love kissed his hand. He started to make more tickling motions on the hand making Bucky double over in laughter.

“Darling we need to get dressed.” He was still laughing when he rolled out of the bed, closing the laptop. He grabbed some Calvins and put those on, blushing at Steve’s stares. He slipped on jeans and one of his V-necks.

“Stevie cmon, we gotta go. It’s already 11.” Steve groaned and rolled out of the bed throwing on some clothes as well. He kissed Bucky’s neck before grabbing his shoes and leaving the bedroom. Bucky followed him. He passed by the picture of them in the living room, the oldest picture of them. It was from ‘41 Steve looks almost unrecognizable. This was before the attacks on Pearl Harbor. Before their lives changed.

Bucky slipped on some shoes and they left the apartment. You may wonder why they leave so early, but the amount of New Yorkers who stop them for a selfie. And Stark tower is quite a ways from their little Brooklyn apartment. They were only stopped by 5 or 6 people on their way. When they finally made it to Avengers tower it was almost noon. They entered the elevator and told it to take them to the Avengers common floor. Most of the floors were for Stark Industries and development projects. Bruce also has home base at the tower, not yet migrated to the compound. He didn’t really care to, all of his equipment and teams were at the tower and in the city. It was were the Avengers went for meetings because most lived in the city. The compound was under construction anyway. Bucky always wondered how the hell they could get mold. It was in visions room, so god knows what he keeps in there.

The elevator took them up 50 floors and stopped to make a pick up. The doors opened and Bruce came in.

“Hey Barnes and Noble.” He said.

“I swear to God.” Bucky said and put his hand over Bruce’s mouth, he turned green and not in the usual way.

“How do you catch me every single time.” The black-haired man said.

“You just aren’t trying hard enough,” Bucky said. He and Loki got along like peas and carrots. They both fit the mold of the misunderstood villain.

“You know after so long, This isn’t as funny,” Steve said. Loki just laughed. He had his Midgard clothes on, but not his witch clothes. He was just in a hoodie. Loki the probationary Avenger in casual clothing, pretending to be Dr. Banner. That was his usual choice when loitering around the tower. He wasn’t usually allowed to leave.

The elevator made it to the Avengers penthouses, this one being the lowest. The three men made their way into one of the casual meeting rooms. On their way Steve snaked his hand into Bucky’s, something they couldn’t do outside.

“Ugh.” Loki groaned at their affection. He didn’t look like he was pleased with their relationship, but on the inside, he looked up to them. They way they stuck together, just made Loki have hope.

Pierto came in in his wheelchair, it struck most as ironic. QuickSilver in a wheelchair. But with all the damage he took the more rest and time off feet the better. He hated it but preferred living. 

Almost everyone was there, most avengers that you can imagine were there. Except for Carol and some of the guardians. Well all of the guardians, god knows what they were doing. Steve noticed everyone except for Peter, strangely enough, he was nowhere to be seen. It’s Spring Break too, so he’s definitely not in school. Steve shrugged it away and took a seat on one of the couches. It seemed to him that the four couches were led by the power couples, Steve and Bucky, Clint and Natasha, Tony and Pepper, and Wanda and Vision. The rest of the non- couples were sitting amongst the rest. Loki with Steve and Bucky and so on. The final member joined their meeting, Thor late as usual. He sat down next to Clint, as it was the only seat available. It was justified, he did have the longest travel distance.

“So I guess we’re all here,” Tony said, Pepper was sitting next to him. She wasn’t always at these meetings but no one batted an eye.

“This isn’t our normal meeting. This is more of an announcement, and that is also the reason Peter isn’t here. He already knows and we wouldn’t want him spoiling what we’re about to say.” Pepper said. Steve looked at Bucky with eyes of stars.

“Should we get to the point?” Tony said smiling at his wife.

“I’m pregnant.” Steve was smiling ear to ear. If you ask Bucky he’s been waiting for this for years. If you ask Steve it’s all he’s ever wanted. He turned to Bucky and mouthed ‘I’m going to be an uncle.’ Bucky mouthed ‘that’s not how that works.’

“This is amazing Pepper!” Natasha said. She was always sensitive about this stuff, but has been waiting a while.

“Are you saying there will be a young Stark?” Vision said. Wanda laughed and nodded. Bucky was having a mix of emotions. Steve ran up to Pepper and hugged her, gently but strong.

“I’m going to be the best uncle.” He whispered into Pepper’s ear. She hugged him back, “I know you will.” Tony stood up to hug Rhodey.

“Ok Steve I know you’re serious stuff but i’m the baby’s favorite uncle.” Rhodey said, looking over his shoulder Bucky saw Vision still confused.

“I do not think I understand.” Vision said again. Tony laughed and sat next to him.

“Ok Vision so me and Pepper did mating and now she is carrying my spawn, got it.” Multiple people in the room laughed at Tony’s comments.

“I think I understand now.” He said. Tony patted his back. Wanda was still throwing a fit laughing. Bucky was sitting on the couch, he had moved to the corner of the couch. Steve turned around from the celebration and saw him curled up he came over to him and sat down.

“You okay Buck?” He whispered. Bucky shook his head.

“I’m just afraid.” He looked to Pepper, surrounded by people giving her hugs and feeling her stomach.

“Afraid of what, bear?” Steve asked in the most loving and comforting voice. He rubbed his back and held his metal hand.

“I’m afraid i’ll hurt it. I’ve done enough to their family.” He put his head in Steve’s chest.

“That wasn’t you Bucky. That was someone else. Not my Bucky. Not my Bucky.” He kissed his nose, lightly. Tony turned around and saw them. He saw what Steve didn’t. He saw that Bucky was crying. Two tears fell down his cheek. He got himself up and moved to them. He bent down to his level.

“Bucky you won’t hurt her. You aren’t that man.” He touched his face and took the tear away. Steve saw him and was confused on why the man who is the most afraid of Bucky is comforting him.

“What do you mean her?” Bucky said, pushing loose hair away from his eyes.

“Well we don’t actually know yet, but I'm hoping. And you know what, I'm afraid too. I’m afraid I’ll end up like my dad and ruin it. But you have nothing to worry about. And despite anything that I’ve said, I want you to be it’s uncle Bucky and uncle Steve.” Now Steve was crying, not out of sadness though. He was so happy. So, so happy.

“Thank you Tony.” Steve said. He was still stroking the arm.

“That means a lot,” Bucky said. When they weren’t looking Pepper came over to them. She snuck away while everyone was talking to Nat and Clint.

“Hey Pep,” Bucky said.

“How far along are you…” He was trying to make small talk and ask questions.

“3 months and 2 days. Stephen has good tech. More accurate than most clinics.”

“You know what, you guys should be godfathers,” Tony said. Pepper turned to him and held his hand, patting it.

“I really like that. And we already decided on a godmother.” Steve figured that one out pretty quickly.

“I would really like that too.” Bucky said.


	3. Trei

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The team has just finished a mission in Greenland which means medicals at SHIELD. Steve's least favorite. Within the giant headquarters, Steve is separated from Bucky without any knowledge of his condition.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wee I'm back. Hope everyone is having a good time 
> 
> -This gets a little sad so gauge your sensitiveness and grab tissues.   
-When the cat is referred to Alpine or Tobi it is the same cat. There is in fact a story behind this.

“Ow. That really stings,” Steve said, sitting in a chair at a New York SHIELD facility. A nurse was patching him up after a mission. A simple one, but involved a couple of punches thrown and a nice fall. This was his least favorite part of a mission, cleaning up. Having some random SHIELD nurse rub peroxide on his wounds while Bucky is off somewhere he is never told. 

“Is Buck- Barnes okay?” He asked the nurse while she was unrolling some bandages. She turned around. 

“I’m sorry, but I don’t know where he is.” She said, dabbing more peroxide above his eye. She covered it in a bandage wrapped around his head. 

“You’re looking better already, I find it hard to understand how you come back with all these injuries but Miss Romanoff is in tip-top shape.” Steve rolled his eyes. He looked around the room he was in. Just a small room with some medical supplies, a chair, and a bed. There were a few wall decorations, who knows who put these up. But after looking at them he realized that it was probably Coulson who put up all the Captain America posters and no one had the heart to take them down. 

“I know I'm not supposed to ask, but what happened out there. In Greenland right?” She had a small voice, she was a small person after all. Like Doctor Cho but smaller and younger. She kind of reminded him of Bucky’s younger sister. Rebecca. She was almost ten years younger than him. They weren’t together for very long. Steve only knew her while she lived in Brooklyn, she was about eight then. Then their parents died and Bucky stayed while she went back to Indiana. 

“You remind me of this girl I used to know. Back then. She was Bucky’s sister. Rebecca, Becky, I haven’t seen her since 1937 probably. It makes me sound old.”    
  


“I hate to break it to you, but you are pretty old Captain Rogers.” She said, picking up a folder and skimming it. 

“I guess you’re right.” He sat back and reached for his phone. He realized that it had been confiscated by Fury or someone else before the mission. Trackable. 

“I’ll be off. Thank you, Captain Rogers.” She opened the door and left, turning a sign on the door around. He sat still in the chair wondering about Bucky. He looked pretty beat up too, last time they saw each other. With an estimate that was five or more hours ago. He didn’t quite know how long ago it was when he saw Bucky asleep on the Jet. He didn’t pass out, he took a sleeping pill so he could rest. Then they took him to do his regular tests after a mission. That was what Steve hated. When they took him away to make sure no one did anything to him and Steve was left all alone. He got up from the chair, peeled off his uniform and put on the gray shirt and jeans that they left for him. He was looking around the room to find something about where Bucky was. He saw the folder that the nurse left behind. It had a big red CLASSIFIED stamped on the front. It was about him, wasn’t it? He opened it up and saw pictures of him. These were just from this mission. It had his current information on it, details on some of what happened. Just that he fell from pretty high up and landed on some bushes. Bucky fell with him. Hopefully, he wasn’t as beat up as him. While he was digging through the thin file the door opened and an eyepatched man walked in. 

“Steven Grant Rogers, what are you doing?” His large voice boomed through the tiny room. Steve jumped out of fright. 

“I just wanted to find Bucky,” He said. He found nothing in that file. 

“Rogers you know exactly what I’m going to say, You can’t see Barnes during his medicals. It’s a safety thing.”    
  


“I just want to see him, Fury.” 

“I’m sorry. Stay here.” He pointed to the chair and bed. He put his phone on the table and left the room. Steve picked up the phone. He had a few notifications but not many. He tried something that was sure to fail. He texted Bucky. 

-Buck, I’m worried if you’re in a room tell me where you are. 

Steve sat down on the bed. He waited for a response he was waiting almost 20 minutes with nothing. He was fed up. He left the room. He ran down the hallway and looked around. He knew that Bucky had to be on this floor, medicals. Unless he was in… Steve preferred not to think that could happen. He was already in the second step on infiltration, getting into classified areas. There were names outside some doors. He had S. Rogers on a card outside. A bit of the way down the corridor he saw N. Romanoff. He opened the door, hoping no one else was in there. 

“Nat!” He ran up to hug her. She had changed clothes too. She was just in some shorts and a shirt. Fewer bandages, just one on her wrist where she was cut up. 

“What are you doing here, we’re supposed to stay in these rooms. That’s what we always do.” She was whispering, trying not to be heard by someone passing by.

“I’m looking for Bucky, I think something’s wrong. What if he didn’t actually take a sleeping pill on the jet and just passed out. What if he had a stroke. Nat, I’m scared, I need to find him.” He fell onto her shoulder.

“We’ll find him. And about the pills, I don’t know. I think they take him to one of the big rooms a floor up. They do something with the arm maybe, I don’t know much Steve. Good luck.” He nodded and left the room silently. He checked the rest of the floor for something, anything. He ended up at the elevator, took it up a floor and ran around trying to find where he was. He was wandering the hallways, losing all hope when one of the doors opened and he saw Doctors running with a gurney with… Bucky on it. He screamed and ran ahead of them. 

“That’s James Barnes, he’s my boyfriend. Is he okay? Please tell me.” The doctors kept running taking him into a surgical theatre. A nurse stepped outside the room and told Steve to stay out. 

“Sir, we’ll try to keep you posted but you need to stay out here.” He pointed to a tiny sitting area outside the operating room. He sat down on the crusty couch. He waited. Part of him wanted to take the elevator to Nat’s room and cry to her. 

“I can’t lose you again,” Steve whispered to himself while scrolling through photos of Bucky on his phone. There were a bunch from recently. Of them in the apartment. Of Tobi when they first adopted her. She was with the Starks right now, well more specifically with Pepper who likes cats. 

Steve lie down on the couch, not able to extend fully. He sat there for a while, according to the clock for about two hours. That was when Nick Fury of all people came over to the little waiting room. 

“So you decided to find him.” 

“Yeah, I did.” 

“Steve I was trying to protect you from this stuff. He’s really vulnerable right now. And if you really want to know, they were examining him and his heart rate dropped and blood pressure dropped. They had to take him in to stop hemorrhaging. He hasn’t woken up yet but the bleeding stopped.” Steve breathed a sigh of relief. 

“Can I-”   
  


“Yes.” Steve got up and ran into the recovery room. Bucky was lying there, his arm was off. 

“Steve” He whispered. 

“They said that I was bleeding inside. I thought I was going to die Steve. I never said goodbye to you. I told you I was going to take a nap, but I was in so much pain I knew I was going to pass out. I’m so sorry Steve.” He coughed. The nurse held a tissue out so he wouldn’t get blood all over himself. 

“You don’t have to apologize, baby, I was the one that jumped. I should have held onto you tighter. I should have found another way.” Steve was holding his hand, kneeling by the bed. He kissed his hand. 

“Excuse me do you know when he’ll get his arm back?” He asked one of the nurses. He knew what they were doing. They take his arm every time they return from a mission. They have to check it for chips and hacking. If someone gets into it, Bucky could be compromised. Usually, this process is them taking the arm then going home. SHIELD would bring it back a day or two later. But now Bucky is hurt, sick. 

“I don’t know, it may need to be repaired but I’m not sure. I’m sorry.” The nurse said, going to take Bucky’s blood pressure again.

“You’re looking much better Mr. Barnes.” The nurse said. Bucky mustered up enough strength to sit up and scoot over. He patted the space on the bed next to him and Steve sat next to him. He wrapped his arms around his boyfriend. 

“I love you, I wanted to say that for a couple of hours. I didn’t say goodbye before you went to sleep. When I thought you were dead I knew I wasn’t able to say goodbye.” Bucky put his face in Steve’s hair. 

“I love you too. I love you so much.” Bucky said. 

“But I’m so tired, and I know you are too. So share this twin bed with me and sleep.” He put his head on the blonde’s chest. He fell asleep almost instantly. Steve made sure to check the monitors to make sure he was okay before he joined him in sleep. 

“BOYS YOU BETTER WAKE UP.” Steve rubbed his eyes looking at Nick, once again. He sat up, looking towards Bucky. He was still asleep. He shook him awake. Bucky coughed and sat up. He wiped his arm on a tissue.

“Do I get to go home now?” Bucky said. Fury pulled a folder out of his coat and looked it over. 

“You’re gonna get to go home, but you are being put on bed rest. Steve you gotta keep him off his feet. Make sure he doesn’t mess himself up again. You’ll get your arm back in 1-2 business days. Keep yourself hydrated and take your medication. See you later love nuts.” He left the room. Steve hugged Bucky and helped him up. He saw the vacuum sealed bag with his clothes and phone. 

“So that’s why you didn’t get my texts.” He opened the bag to help Bucky get dressed. He was having a hard time walking. He watched as Bucky undid the strings on the gown he was in. The gown fell to the ground. Steve covered his mouth when he saw his body. If Steve thought he was bad, Bucky was much worse. 

“Baby what happened?” Steve sat down next to him. He saw the bandages on some spots and some left exposed. 

“You and Nat went off to kill the power and I ran into the wrong corner and some of them got to me. I was able to get them off of me before they cut me too deep. But they still beat me up pretty good.” He grabbed the black pants and tried to put them on himself but struggled. Steve helped him pull them up his legs. He did the same with the shirt, one of the sleeves hanging limp. He slipped the jacket on, the sleeve once again hanging. Steve picked him up off the bed. 

“We’re going to visit someone first.” He whispered. Right before they left the room the voice of the nurse boomed from behind. 

“Wait you two, I don’t expect you to carry him home. He can barely walk, nor is he supposed to.” She brought in a wheelchair. Steve put Bucky in it and kissed his forehead. 

“Now we meet up with someone, then head to the Tower to pick another someone up.” He started pushing Bucky through the hallway, passing doctors who waved. They got to the elevator and went down a floor. Bucky was confused. He pushed Bucky down until they reached the room that he was in a couple hours previously. He said a prayer and opened the door. 

“Nat!” 

  
“Bucky.” She would have gotten up but she was hooked up to an IV. She sat up instead. 

“It’s been like six hours, I’ve had a whole blood transfusion in that time.” She pointed to an empty IV bag stained red. When Steve thought about it, she did lose a lot blood today. She got beat up too, but everyone did. They ran into some trouble. Sam and Clint were on the other side of the building, and they hadn’t seen them yet. But they might be at a different facility or back home already. 

“Have you heard from Clint?” Steve asked. Nat lifted up the blanket and Clint rolled out, wincing. 

“Oh god, how long has he been down there?” Bucky said, leaning forward to make sure he was real. Next thing he saw was Sam freaking Wilson rolling out as well. 

“How the hell do you guys fit down there?” Bucky laughed. 

“Ah shit what happened to you?” Sam said, rolling his hand against the chair. 

“Long story.” He sat back, Steve rubbing his shoulders. 

“I’m tired baby..” Bucky said. Steve gave a sympathetic smile. 

“Sorry guys we gotta pick Tobi up from our hormonal cat sitter. Toodles.” He waved to them and left the tiny room, giving them some more space. 

“Hey baby, we’re going to Tony’s so we can pick up Tobi okay?” 

“Okay…” Bucky dozed off and didn’t wake up until about forty five minutes later when they were in Avengers Tower in Pepper’s office. He woke up on the couch. 

“Holy- Shi.. Steve. Pepper? Where the fuck am I?” Steve laughed. He patted Bucky’s shoulder. 

“You fell asleep back at the hospital, we’re at the tower. To pick up our cat.” He showed him the white cat he was holding. Bucky wanted to name her Alpine, which they did, but one time he was drunk and called him Tobi. It’s more of a comical thing that they kept the name. 

“Well I’m sure it was a great nap. How the hell did you move me without me waking up?” Bucky was so puzzled, the other two people in the room couldn’t help but laugh at him. 

“Sweetheart, you are a far heavier sleeper than you appear.” He put some of his hair behind his ears. 

“How are you doing Pep?” Bucky asked, trying to get himself up. Steve helped him sit up on the plush couch. 

“We’re doing very well. You better keep yourself together because my baby needs her godfathers in one piece.” Steve chuckled. 

“I had a doctors appointment with Tony and apparently we have one healthy baby. You should have seen Tony when the doctor confirmed there was only one baby. Poor man was afraid we were having twins the amount they’re kicking in there.” She patted her stomach, barely a bump. 

“You know I’m kind of glad that you’re only having one too, I think it would stress me out too much.” Pepper laughed. Steve picked him up bridal style, taking him by surprise. He gave him a kiss on the nose and put him in the wheelchair. 

“We should be headed home, get this guy ready for ‘Let’s not have another stroke’ bed rest.” He patted the man’s head and took the handlebars of the wheelchair. 

“Goodbye Alpine,” Pepper said kissing the cat’s head and putting her on Bucky’s lap. He hugged her. 

“I missed you Alpy. And thank you for referring to her by her real name, not something that I said while drunk.”

“Okay old man let’s get you home.” He waved to Pepper before wheeling him out of the building and into a taxi. He folded the chair up and put Bucky into the taxi. 

“Where to?” The driver said. 

“Brooklyn 24th street. Just drop us off at the sign.” 

“Wait aren’t you that Steve Rogers guy?” The driver had a thick brooklyn accent. He didn’t notice Bucky, but he was hard to recognize at the moment. He didn’t have one arm, he was beat up all over, and was in a wheelchair for christ’s sake. 

“You could say that.” He said quietly.

“Man I never thought that I would be driving Captain America around. Oh won’t you look at that, here we are. No charge.” Steve thanked him and helped Bucky out of the taxi. He put him in the chair only to realize that their apartment is a walk up. He sighed, put the wheelchair in one hand and Bucky in the other. 

“Goddamn you surprise me every time you do this.” He touched Steve’s bicep. He looked at him as if he had seen him like this for the first time. “Sometimes I forget you’re not that little kid from Brooklyn.” Steve laughed and carried him and the SHIELD wheelchair up the stairs. He opened the door as if he had grown a third arm, carried Bucky into the bedroom and placed him on the bed. 

“Thank you Stevie.” He said in a little voice. Steve put the chair against the wall. 

“You are very welcome.” He kissed the brunet’s cheek. 

“How about we get back into those documentaries. We never finished the ‘Earth’s Mightiest Heroes’ Maybe we should just cuddle up and let you get better, I’ll bring you some orange juice.” Steve got up to go to the kitchen and grab a glass of orange juice for Bucky. Doctors orders to keep him hydrated. When he came back into the bedroom he about dropped the glass. 

“Bucky why are you taking off your clothes. Are you too hot? Do I need to turn down the heat?” 

“No it’s fine here, I just. Steve come here baby.” Steve sat on the bed. 

“Bucky you’re not in a condition to… Honey please stop. We are not right now.” Bucky touched his chest.

“Steve…” He put his hand on Steve’s thigh before falling asleep.

“Fucker can’t even stay awake to get off.” He rolled his eyes and went to get some work done. Every fifteen minutes he would check on him, make sure he’s okay. He feels super bad for him, he hates when he doesn’t have his arm. The guy already tried jerking it which never works one handed. Just looking at him, all beat up and covered in bandages. It almost brings tears to Steve’s eyes. Reminds him of when he found him in the HYDRA facility. He was so dazed and out of it. Now the meds they have him on make him super tired all the time. 

“Bucky it’s going to be okay. I promise. I’ll never let you get hurt ever again.” 

  
  
  


“Steve I can walk you don’t have to keep walking me around like I’m your grandpa.” Bucky said while Steve pushed him around a target while he grabbed fourteen packs of double stuf oreos. 

“Bucky you are 102 years old.Also we do not need this many oreos.” 

“Fair point also I need these oreos.” He held them in his lap. Steve put the rest of the groceries they actually needed in his basket.

“Hey, Steve?” 

“Yes?”   
  


“Can I get a red bull?”

“No.” 

“Why.” 

“Because four days ago you had a stroke and massive hemorrhage so no you can’t have a red bull.” Steve pushed him to checkout. They brought his arm back a day ago, so he is no longer the one-armed man that he was this week. 

“Ok you maybe 102 years old according to your driver's license, but you are actually two years old.” Bucky just laughed and let Steve push him around like a kid in a stroller. They checked out getting some stares. 

“50 dollars even.” The cashier said. Steve just stared at his boyfriend as he handed over the credit card. 

“Oh shit. You’re Captain America.”   
  
“Yeah. I know. Do you want a selfie or something?” 

“I’m good, one time I saw Black Widow on the subway. Nothing beats that hottie.” 

“Respect women bitch.”   
  


“Bucky…” Steve said, keeping him in check. He handed the cashier his money, grabbed his groceries, and left the Target. They walked back to the apartment, or he pushed and Bucky rode. 

“You should be glad that Pierto gave us his old chair because no matter what you say, you can’t walk for shit.” Steve continued to push him down the street. Bucky put his foot in the wheel to stop it. He lifted himself up and started walking. 

“See I’m not an old man, I can walk just fine-” He fell down. Steve picked him up off the ground. 

“Bucky you are on bedrest, and you aren’t well. I told you, now get in the chair and we’ll go home.” Bucky limped over to the chair and sat down. Steve brought him into the apartment and put him on the couch. 

“I want my oreos.” Steve rolled his eyes and threw two packs of Oreos at him. Steve put in a DVD of The Wizard of Oz. Bucky opened his first pack and started munching. This was one of their favorite movies to watch. It brought them back to a movie theatre in 1939 when they went together. They put coats on their laps to hide the fact they were holding hands. They went into the bathroom afterwords and kissed. Nothing else. They just kissed and held hands. It was just love. They hadn’t quite taken the next step. 

But now they didn’t have coats on their laps. They were holding hands, metal on skin. Bucky’s head was on Steve’s shoulder as he ate his Oreos. 

“Man Oreos are fucking great.” Bucky said, chewing another. 

And Steve thought, this is really great.


	4. Patru

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky relives some of his memories from Wakanda, the vividness of the sunshine, the sounds of the village children playing, and the visits from Shuri. It all comes back in a vivid sense. Bucky and Steve come to grips on a decision long put off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Hey Hey! Chapter four coming right up. Why are these notes getting so enthusiastic?
> 
> -The Alpine/ Tobi thing comes back here. To clear everything up, the cat's name is Alpine but one night when Bucky was V E R Y drunk he called her Toby by mistake. The name kind of stuck. 
> 
> -I will continue the Wakanda Story. More background information here
> 
> -In here I imagine that Bucky was awake for nearly a year or a whole year before he was called to fight with the Avengers

The sun shined through what Bucky considered a window. It was rising, his alarm clock. He got out of the bed, straightened the cloth that covered his lack of an arm, and went to feed his goats. He grabbed two buckets, one for water and one for feed. He went into the barn and filled the first bucket with food for his goats. He brought it out to where they were trained by him to meet when the sun rises. He puts the food in the trough and goes to the pump for water. 

The village has been nice to him. Not just nice but kind. The children love him and the stories he reads them. They taught him how to care for the goats. They taught him how to take care of his stumpy arm with water from the well and peppermint. And it really helped. 

Shuri comes around once a week. She checks up on him and talks to him. She keeps the children away sometimes. Every time she visits he asks the same question, “Where is Steve?” And every day she will tell him, “Not yet.” 

But one day she brought him to the palace. He insisted that he should change his clothes out of his village garb. But Shuri told him to stay the way he was. Bucky told his goats goodbye before leaving with her. 

“Goodbye Steve, Goodbye Nat, Goodbye Sam, and Goodbye Fury.” He waved to the four and got into a car with Shuri. He rode all the way to the palace and rode an elevator up to Shuri’s room. He got a lot of stares from people in the capital city. Probably the fact that he has one arm, is dressed like a goat farmer and is the whitest person in a five hundred mile radius. 

Shuri brought him to a desk with a laptop. On the laptop was a video of Steve. He ran to it and sat down. It was the first time he had seen Steve in months. He put his hand on the screen. 

“I miss you so much, I can’t wait to see you again. I really hope I can come and see you. I hope you are feeling better Bucky.” 

“I love you,” Bucky whispered. 

“I love you too,” Steve said back and Bucky was shocked. He thought that it was just a video, but it turns out it was a live video chat. 

“Are you there, right now?” 

“I am.”

“Stevie I miss you so much,” Bucky said Steve wiped a tear from his face. Bucky didn’t notice that he was crying. 

“Hearing that from you… It’s amazing. How are you doing?” 

“I’m great. I’m feeling like myself. I’m taking care of my goats and missing you.” He put his head on his shoulder. Bucky turned around to Shuri and asked her, “When can he come here?” 

“So… I was thinking that he could come next week. Tuesday. Please don’t scream.” 

“I get to see you!” Bucky said still crying. 

“I want to wipe those tears off your face myself. I love you. I’ll see you on Tuesday.” He blew a kiss, followed by Bucky blowing one back. He was so excited to see Steve. It was only in a couple of days, he needed a haircut.

“Bye,” Steve said Bucky mouthed the word back to him. The video cut out. Bucky’s hand was on the screen. 

“It’s really soon. You’ll see him. And while you’re here, take a shower.” She led him to her ensuite bathroom. She gave him shampoo and conditioner, nothing like the stuff in the village. The warm shower was wonderful. He was only in there for fifteen minutes but it felt like fifteen minutes in heaven. 

“Thank you Shuri,” Bucky said. He had put his hair in a bun. It was so soon. 

“You’re looking very well. Much better than the last time I saw you, Mr. Barnes,” Dr. Cho said to him. He sat up and buttoned his shirt. “You don’t need to worry anymore Steve, he’ll be okay. And you don’t need to lug him around in a wheelchair anymore. His strength has improved.” Steve laughed, smiling at Bucky. 

“I’ll permit you for travel and light physical exercise. And that means light, no kinky stuff for the time being.” She laughed and scribbled on a piece of paper. 

“I’m refilling your sleep aids. Take them only if you need them. We don’t want you taking them if you don’t need them.” She handed him the prescription. Steve took his arm and helped him up off the table.   
“Thank you, Doc. I think I want a Redbull now.” Steve rolled his eyes. 

“Mr. Barnes I don’t recommend that, knowing what happened two weeks ago. Another question, have you been seeing your therapist?” Steve sighed. He knew Bucky hadn’t been going. And he knew he should be going. 

“Bucky…” Cho scribbled some things down on her paper. 

“I’m going to make a few calls and get you started again, It’s important. You have PTSD and for good reason. You can’t keep your problems away just by eating Oreos and fighting.” She wrote some more things down. Bucky felt guilty now. He hadn’t seen a therapist in months. 

“Fine, I’ll see a therapist.” Steve breathed a sigh of relief. He took his hand. They left the hospital, grabbed Bucky’s prescription, and took a car home. Bucky was doing crunches on the ground. 

“Cho said light.” 

“This is light.” 

“No, it’s not, and get up.” He held out his hand, Bucky took it. He let go and sat down at the kitchen table. 

“Stevie come here.” He patted the seat. Steve sat down next to him. Bucky held his hand. “I’ve been thinking about something. I want to go public.” Steve gasped. 

“Baby, are you sure?” He squeezed his hand. Bucky nodded. 

“How are we going to?” Steve was shaking, as was Bucky. This was the largest step in their relationship since they got together in 1939. 

“I don’t know, but I can’t keep this to myself. I can’t walk by you in the street as if we are just some friends or strangers. I want to post pictures of us kissing on Instagram. I don’t want the museum to say that I was your ‘best friend since childhood’ and nothing else. I want the world to know. I think I have an idea.” He squeezed his boyfriend’s hand again. 

He picked up his cell phone and dialed a number. He put the phone on speaker. 

“Yes?”   
“Tony, we want to go public with our relationship.” There was silence on the other end of the line. 

“Oh. Well, that’s great. What do you want me to do? Why did you call me?” Bucky thought for a moment. His only plan was to call Tony, he assumed that he would know what to do.

“What do you think we should do? Should we hire Time Magazine or should we make an Instagram post of us kissing while wrapped in a pride flag? I don’t know how to announce this but I know that I want to. How did you and Pepper announce your relationship,” Steve said. There was silence again. 

“Well we didn’t quite announce us dating, we were just spotted and no one was surprised. Everyone saw us dance at parties and everyone knew us. You could just tell everyone on Social Media, but I don’t know if that’s your style. Old people are not attuned to modern ways.” They could hear Pepper snort from laughter in the background. 

“We’ll try to find something.” 

“Best of luck!” Pepper said before they hung up.

“Ugh. I need to go for a walk. Clear my mind,” Bucky said. He stood up. 

“I’ll come with you.” Steve got up as well. Bucky nodded and they went outside their home. They started walking, side by side. They walked in silence, taking in the sounds of the city. They lived in a somewhat quiet pocket of Brooklyn. There weren’t many cars on the street, and very few people were walking. 

They had been walking for a while. They had amazing stamina and could walk for close to forever without stopping. Bucky had leaned in closer the farther they went. 

Bucky put his hand in Steve’s. Steve held it back. They didn’t think of anything. They didn’t think about who could be seeing them, they were just in love. And they didn’t care. 

“Shit.” 

“Yeah, well I guess we don’t have to worry about finding a way to tell everyone,” Steve said, looking at the phone and laptop. Two days ago they went for their walk and Bucky took Steve’s hand. Someone saw them and snapped a picture, sending it around. Now there were ‘theory’ videos everywhere. They haven’t left the house since. Those two days there had been reporters surrounding the building, desperately waiting for someone to exit. 

“Steve what do we do?” Bucky was peeking out the window, shutting the curtains immediately. He was less frightened about the fact of coming out and more the fact of the people outside his house. 

“We tell them, if that’s what you want to do.” Bucky nodded. He stepped back into Steve’s arms. 

“I love you,” He said before kissing him. They put on nicer clothes, shoes, and Bucky polished his arm. If all went well, they would be on Television for good reasons and not harassment against them. 

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Steve said taking his hand. He squeezed it and let go, walking to the door. The opened it, walked down the flight of stairs, took a deep breath, and opened the door on Steve’s lead. The cameras began flashing and the reporters yelling. 

“Mr. Barnes, Mr. Rogers!” They all yelled to them. Steve waved. Most got quiet but one shouted, “Steve, are you gay?” He stopped for a moment, there was total silence. 

“No.” Bucky turned to him with a questioning look. “I’m Bisexual.” They erupted. Bucky took his hand in his. Steve took hit a step forward and kissed him. The cameras flashed around them. They didn’t stay in the kiss too long, they backed away to answer some questions. 

“How long have you been in a relationship?” 

“Since 1939, but of course there were a few roadblocks,” Steve laughed theatrically. He was worried about Bucky, he was going to get grilled by the press. 

“Excuse me.” Steve was giving his nicest, ‘Captain America’ smile. He shuffled away from the reporters to Bucky. He put his arm around him. 

“What obstacles have been put in front of your relationship?” The reporter asked. 

“I mean, there was the whole Steve being frozen and me being brainwashed for HYDRA so that got in the way of our romance but you could guess that.” Steve was proud of Bucky taking control. 

“Thank you for answering our questions,” She said. They turned and went back into the building. They waited for a while before sitting on the couch together.

“Well it’s out there now. Forever,” Steve said. Bucky pushed him. “Don’t be such a downer.” Steve stood up and went to the kitchen, grabbed a bottle of wine and two glasses. He put them on the table along with the candles. Bucky gave him a look and stood up. Steve lit the candles and turned down the lights. 

“Here, drinks by candlelight. To celebrate.” Bucky sat next to him. He poured a glass of the red liquid into the glass. They clinked glasses to being out and proud. 

“I love you, this is going to be a good thing,” Steve said kissing Bucky’s cheek. They drank their wine to the sounds of big band jazz. After two glasses they stood up and danced. Hand in hand, Bucky’s hand around Steve’s waist. They swayed to the music. 

“Remember when we would do this with the curtains tied shut and the radio turned low?” Bucky whispered in Steve’s ear. 

“I remember, if I would recover from being ill you would dance with me. It was always what motivated me to get better.” He leaned on Bucky’s shoulder as they swayed. 

“I loved you even back then. That’s why I always sat by your bedside. I couldn’t let you die at 16. So I fed you and took care of you so when you got better we could run around like kids.” Bucky laughed. 

“Bucky…” Steve was getting flustered very quickly. 

“Oh don’t get all blushy baby, I’m just calling you beautiful and mine.” He began to nip at his neck, only making the situation more heated. 

“Oh Bucky…” Steve whispered. 

“Do you want to…take this to the bedroom?” Bucky whispered in his ear. He was the only person that made Steve like this. He could make him melt. Steve just nodded. Bucky picked him up and took him to the bedroom and they didn’t come back the same as before. 

“Is it looking good?” That next morning there were many news reports about them. Like the country had anything better to do than read ‘Steve Rogers Sexuality revealed!’ stories. 

“It’s not bad,” Steve replied. Bucky was laying on his side, propped on his elbows. He raked his hand down his boyfriend’s chest. They were still undressed from the night before. They woke up and Steve grabbed his phone and saw all the pictures of them kissing everywhere. Most were positive. Things like, ‘Captain America stands for LGBTQ+ Rights!’ and ‘Representation Matters! Cap comes out!’ the staple was the exclamation points and lack of Bucky in the titles. After a bit of scrolling he found what he didn’t want to see. ‘Has our Children’s role model been brainwashing them to homosexuality?’ He sighed and rolled into Bucky’s chest. 

“I just want to stay like this all day every day.” He sighed into Bucky’s abs. 

“You know I do too, but sadly we can not, but we may as well stay in here,” Bucky said. He reached to put Steve’s phone down but was interrupted by the ringing of it. Of course they would be called by Tony. They answered. 

“This isn’t terrible. The online stuff is mostly white noise, but you’re on the times. Have you seen it?” They hadn’t seen the papers yet. 

“Should we do an interview? You know they’re going to ask.” Steve said. He opened his phone and saw the front cover of the New York Times wasn’t them kissing it was Steve with his hand in Bucky’s. It didn’t show their faces. It was just two hands intertwined. In the background was the Cap logo. There wasn’t an entire article, they hadn’t done an interview yet. It had a paragraph caption summing up the whole evening of reporters. 

‘Captain Steve Rogers comes out’ Was plastered in bold letters. ‘Last night Steve Rogers and James Barnes confirmed the rumors of them in a romantic relationship. Delving deeper the men expressed that they had been in a relationship since 1939. The New York Times has not contacted Mr. Rogers and Mr. Barnes for an interview yet.’ That was what Tony was so excited about. That they got a picture and a caption. But there was an email in his inbox. In both of their inboxes. It was an invitation for an interview whenever it worked for them. 

“Steve don’t even bother asking me, you know we have to do this,” Bucky said. He responded to the email with the days that would work for him. They responded almost instantly that this afternoon worked perfectly for him too. 

“He says he can fit us in at 2 today.” 

“Today? I mean that’s great. Tell him it works for us and we’ll meet him here?” Bucky said. Steve typed and sent it. He kissed Bucky. 

“Which tie should I wear?” 

“The one with the stars. Definitely.” Bucky said, getting out of bed. He didn’t even bother to wrap the sheet around his naked body. Steve followed him, getting dressed. 

“I really hope it goes well and isn’t just bigoted comments the whole time.” Bucky sighed. He got dressed with a button down shirt and tie. He opened his phone for the first time this morning and saw an abundance of texts from their friends. There was even one from Peter. 

‘Congratulations on coming out Mr. Bucky!’ How the hell did he even get Bucky’s number, he had to think. 

“Steve the kid just texted me. How the hell did he get my number?” Steve laughed. 

“You do know there is a group chat. With all of the Avengers.” Bucky was confused. He had never heard of this.

“What.” 

“There’s a big group message with the team. Peter and Shuri send memes.” 

“I can talk to Shuri on here?” Bucky pointed to his phone. 

“Yes. I feel so powerful since I got a few more years with this stuff than you did.” He showed Bucky how to talk to Shuri and how to go onto the group chat. 

“This is amazing. Shuri will keep me posted on my grandchildren.” 

“Your what now?” Steve was buttoning his shirt. 

“My goats had babies.” He showed him some of the pictures of Steve, Nat, Sam, And Fury goats and the babies. 

“They’re cute. I wish I could have gotten to know your children better.” He patted Bucky’s back and straightened his tie. They saw that it was already noon. Taking off to the kitchen to grab a bite, the phone rang again. Natasha. Bucky answered immediately and put it on speaker throughout the house. 

“I turned on my phone this morning and all I saw was a picture of you two swapping spit! When did this happen?” Steve chuckled while he made some eggs.

“Last night we finally talked to the reporters outside. We made a statement.” 

“Well you made a bit more than a statement.” The red head shouted. 

“We have an interview with the New York Times.” Steve said in a sing song voice. Nat scoffed. Of course they do Nat thought. Steve gave Bucky the scrambled eggs he made. \

“What are we going to say?” Bucky asked. He started eating his eggs after smothering them with cheese. 

“I don’t know, ask Nat?” Steve responded. Bucky asked Nat the same question. 

“Just tell them how much you love each other and don’t try to bring up the old boy. You know that old boy.” She winked and Bucky squirmed. He didn’t like to think about him. He hasn’t heard from him in a long time. But it was a few months ago he heard it. He thought that he was going back to his old ways. 

“You already did that thing with one of those papers about that guy so hopefully it will be about your relationship and not your brainwashing.” Nat was always good at summing stuff up. She said goodbye and hung up. The boys sat down to munch on their eggs until the reporter got there. Alpine felt the need to jump on Steve’s lap making him scream. 

“Someone’s awake.” Steve pet her, making the cat purr and squirm to Bucky. Steve knew that she liked Bucky more than him. It was always like that. Bucky adopted her first, so she is more attached to him. 

“I guess it’s almost time,” Steve said looking at the clock. Any moment now the doorbell would ring and a reporter would come in and interview them. Steve put the dishes away while Bucky held Alpine like a baby. 

“Now that I don’t have my goats I have to hold Alpine like my baby,” Bucky said. Steve turned around from the sink. 

“Why don’t you hold me like your baby?” Steve pouted.

“You’re too big I would drop you.” Bucky rebutted. Steve had to laugh. There was one time he fell asleep on the couch and in a moment of love, Bucky carried him into their room at the tower. To make a long story short Bucky dropped Steve, waking him up. Every once in a while Steve brings it up and Bucky blushes angrily. 

“Yeah and you have.” Steve laughed as he recounted the events of that night in Avengers Tower. After a little bit Bucky started laughing again. 

“You can admit, it was kind of funny,” Bucky said, still laughing. 

“And that it was painful. I was dropped, asleep.” They were laughing almost uncontrollably when the doorbell rang. Steve shot up and looked at the clock. It was 1:58. The time flew by so fast. They stood up together, took a deep breath and opened the door. 

Time to tell the world.


	5. Cinci

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky and Steve are interviewed by the New York Times. Natasha sends them an invite to a special event, a walk for amputees. We return to Wakanda in the new Bucky's early days.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back (even though I never went away) 
> 
> -Bucky's first surgery was when he was in Wakanda. 
> 
> -During the Wakanda scene, I used the wonderful drawing as an inspiration   
https://thekaskproject-art.tumblr.com/image/171994469648

The interviewer entered their home. He was a young man, about the age that Steve and Bucky looked to be. He shook both their hands, professionally without any being full of star-struck. 

“Good afternoon Mr. Barnes, Mr. Rogers,” He said while placing his bag on the kitchen table. He took out a camera, tripod, and notepad. 

“Will this be recorded?” Bucky asked, already slicking back the hair. 

“We would like it to be unless there are any problems of course,” He said. Steve put his hand on the small of Bucky’s back, calming him down. 

“That would be fine, no different than a print interview,” Steve said. He grabbed three chairs and put two beside each other and the other in front, right by the camera. 

“Would you take a seat?” They sat down right next to each other. Bucky was somewhat nervous, Steve was trying his very best to make him as calm as possible. “My name is David Yang, I’ve worked for the New York Times for four years, and I am a big fan of your work.” Well, that was a quick introduction, Steve thought. David went behind the camera and turned it on. “Shall we begin.” they nodded. 

“So, you admitted that you have been in a relationship since 1939, before the war and the troubles you went through. How was it, being in a relationship when the whole world was against it?” He put his pen to his paper, awaiting an answer. 

“That’s a very loaded question, but it involved a lot of sneaking around. We had an apartment in Brooklyn and had to be very hush-hush about everything. But in the depression, it was easy to write off moving in together as saving money,” Steve said, taking some of the stress off Bucky. 

“It’s not like now where two men can go on a date without someone batting an eye. We don’t have to put coats on our laps to hold hands in a movie theater now. I think that’s amazing,” Steve smiled, more the fact that Bucky was taking control than the progress of the LGBT. 

“I remember back in ‘40 one of my good friends was thrown in prison because he was seen through a window, having some intimate time. He was convicted of ‘public acts of indecency’ and sentenced to two years and hormone therapy. He died of the side effects of the medication. I’m just so glad that I can talk about this and not be forced to spend my life in prison or die because of some pills,” Bucky said. That hit home for them, he was one of their good friends. He told them that they shouldn’t be ashamed to be who they are. It was only a couple of months later that he was caught. The other guy skipped town before he was drafted, they never found out what happened to him. 

“That’s awful. Imagine all of the people who would have died just for who they love,” David said. “Of course we all know about your story, the ice, the winter soldier, how did all of this affect your relationship?” 

“Badly,” Bucky said, causing everyone in the room to laugh. 

“It really stuck a pin in it,” They kept laughing. The interview went suprisingly well. They didn’t talk about Winter that much. Bucky summed it all up in just one phrase. 

“He’s dead now. There’s no need to wallow in the past,” Bucky said. 

“That’s such a poetic way to tell, thank you, Mr. Barnes.” After an hour of interviewing and laughing, it was beginning to come to an end. 

“Do you have anything to say before we end this interview?” 

“I’m still Captain America and he is still The White Wolf, nothing has changed except that we’ve told you a bit more about our lives. We told you about Steve and Bucky and you can take it as you will.” 

“Thank you so much, it has been an honor.” He shut off the camera. 

“One question, can I hold the shield. Off the clock of course.” Steve laughed and retrieved it from their room. 

“Anything for a fan.” He handed him the shield, David held it for a moment and returned it. 

“Thanks, Again thank you for letting us do this interview.” They shook hands and David left. Bucky immediately flopped onto the couch. He reached under the cushions and picked up one of his oreo packages. He opened his laptop on. A ping showed up as an email from Natasha. 

“Nat emailed me… oh. It’s a flyer for an amputee walk.” 

“Oh?” Steve said from the kitchen, already making some tea. He put in some peppermint to calm Bucky’s nerves. He carried the cups to Bucky and sat on the couch next to him. He leaned over to view the poster. It was called ‘walk for stumpies’ kind of a funny name they both thought. 

“Do you want to go? It’s tomorrow morning. before the interview will be out,” Steve said. 

“I really want to go. I’ve never really talked about it, only trying to hide the fact that I’m missing a limb. And the support is great because not everyone can have a neuro-controlled vibranium arm for free.” Steve leaned against his shoulder and sipped his tea. 

“That sounds like a plan.” They responded to the email saying that they would be there. She and Clint would also be there. Clint is not an amputee, but they are all there for Bucky. 

“I’m so proud of you, Bucky,” Steve whispered into Bucky’s ear. They stayed there on the couch for the rest of the day, watching soap operas and cuddling. Just reveling in what happened. Throughout the day more articles and tweets popped up on their feeds. 

-So proud of @CaptainAmericaOfficial and @TheWhiteWolf. Takes Courage. 

-Can’t wait to hear more of the #BuckyCap story

-How can our kids grow up seeing their role models doing this #boycottcap

“Ugh.” Steve threw his phone to the other side of the couch. Bucky patted his shoulder. “Was this a bad idea?” Steve asked. 

“No, there’s gonna be haters and we’re going to have to get through it. I think we might be helping people through this.” He grabbed Steve’s hand. 

“This can’t be broken.” He squeezed the hand. 

“You’re right. It can’t.” He squeezed back. They were right, it could never be broken. 

“They’ll give you a shirt Bucky, this is how these things work. Just put anything on. Nat is picking us up in like ten minutes.” The sound of Bucky throwing a pile of clothes on the ground filled Steve’s ear and he groaned. He went into the bathroom and took Bucky’s metal hand and kissed up it. 

“Are you ready to go?” 

“You bet your ass I am. We are going to win this fucking race.” 

“Bucky I think you are misunderstanding the event. We are walking.” 

“What am I supposed to do with this information, not show off my fast running skills?” 

“Yes.” Steve laughed. He tied up his shoelaces and looked for Bucky. 

“Should I wear the arm?” He was fiddling with it. He had his laptop on, the program for the arm on. He didn’t have much access or didn’t know how to use it. He had the open button open, ready to take off the arm. 

“What do you think?” 

“I don’t know, that’s why I’m asking you.” He sat on the floor. He touched the arm. 

“You don’t have to take it off just to prove that you belong. You always belong. And hey, everyone knows who we are,” Steve said. 

“I’m gonna keep it.” He closed the laptop and kissed Steve, taking him by surprise. They looked to the clock, 10:00. Basically late for the walk. 

“We really need to go now,” Steve said, slinging his backpack across his shoulder. Bucky laced up his shoes and the men left the house. They took a cab to the local track that was hosting the walk. Neither of them was sure how far they were supposed to walk but were sure they could do this all day. 

Both Bucky and Steve watched out the window on their way. Steve pointed out some of the alleys that he got beat up in way back when. Everything was different. The old movie theatre was a hip smoothie bar, no longer showing movies. The alley where Bucky gave Steve his first handjob wasn’t there anymore, filled with apartments for a growing city. 

“Thank you,” Steve said to the cab driver when he paid him. They got out, walking into the event and signing in. 

“Name...oh my god,” The registration attendant said. She wasn’t looking before, but when she looked up she gasped and dropped her clipboard. 

“Bucky Barnes.”

“Steve Rogers.” 

“I found that out, yes.” She wrote some things down and asked for shirt sizes. They both said large and she handed them some shirts that had their logo on it. 

“Th...Thank you for coming.” She handed them their packets and they put money into the donation box. 

“How much did you give?” Steve asked. 

“100 dollars.” Steve would have objected to giving that much, but it really was for a good cause, a cause that Bucky knows too well. He unfolded the shirt and saw on the back of his said, I’ve been a #ProudAmputee since _____. He guessed that he was supposed to use the fabric marker to fill in the year he lost his arm. On the back of Steve’s shirt, it had, #Iwalkfor ____. Steve grabbed his fabric marker and wrote Bucky Barnes with a little heart. Bucky took his marker and wrote, 1945 in big letters. He was already expecting questions and this only tops the cake. 

“We make quite a pair of centennials eh?” He held Bucky’s hand as they walked into the community center. Inside the large room were various organizations that were talking about their missions and if they were accepting donations. Bucky and Steve brought money that they had leftover. Most people are often confused about how they make their money. Mainly when SHIELD pays them for regular stuff and when the US government and SHIELD pay them for taking down HYDRA operatives, spies, and bases. That’s their big check that they use for this stuff, the thousands of dollars that the department of homeland security gives them when they bring in a HYDRA spy. They received far too much money for their Greenland mission, they did take down an entire base. Homeland security basically blows their whole budget every time they take down a base that had bombing plans. That’s where this is coming from. 

Bucky went around to all the different tables and gave them donations and learned about what they do. 

“You guys are so amazing. I wish there were things like this back when,” Bucky said to a woman at The Stumpy Project, the non-profit running the walk. On the other side of the large room was a stage with chairs facing it. A woman with a prosthetic leg walked onto the stage and picked up a microphone. 

“Good morning everyone! I would like to welcome everyone to take a seat.” Everyone in the room, including Steve and Bucky took a seat by the stage. The woman had a mousey voice, quiet but full of leadership. 

“My name is LeAnn, I lost old lefty when I was 18, I co-founded the Stumpy Project when I was 22. All those years ago, of which it was 8, I saw how people, young and old did not have the money to buy prosthetics and end up losing their jobs and cannot pay medical bills. I went through this exact experience when I was in college, barely able to pay off loans, much less get a new leg. So we founded this project to help reduce or wave the fees of necessary prosthetics or provide medical bill assistance for everyone. Now that I’ve shared my story, does anyone out there want to share their story?” Bucky slumped into his chair. Steve knew just as well as Bucky that he wasn’t ready to share. A woman who had a cosmetic prosthetic arm stood up and walked onto the stage. 

“Hi, my name is Daphne and I lost my right hand in Afganistan. A roadside bomb sent me falling down and it was severed below the shoulder. It took a while to get over the emotional pain and learn to use my other arm and of course, learn to write again.” LeAnn thanked her and she sat back down. Another amputee came up, double legs lost due to toxic shock syndrome. 

“I assure you I will never wear another tampon again.” Bucky was confused, he had no idea whay she was talking about. He had a general idea about what a tampon was but had no idea how she could have lost her legs over it. He made a mental note to ask Nat later. After this woman and another man talked about their stories, some longer than the other. A few gave whole sermons while a few gave a couple sentences. 

“I’m going up there,” Bucky said. Steve held his hand. And mouthed, “are you sure?” Bucky nodded and stood up to go to the stage. 

“Hello, my name is James Buchanan Barnes but you can call me Bucky. You might know me as that guy from the avengers or that guy who they thought was a terrorist. I’ll just tell you that I'm not a terrorist. I was used as a weapon for some guys called HYDRA, now what does this have to do with the fact that I am missing an arm? Before everything happened I was drafted into the US army. My boyfriend Steve and I along with the howling commandos were fighting Nazis all day every day. Until one day we found ourselves hanging from a moving train and I slipped, falling. To this day I don’t know how I survived or who found me, but they were from HYDRA. My arm was busted from the fall, I was told many years later that It was completely severed when I fell. Many years of cryostasis later I’m here, all better and feeling great.” The room was silent for a moment before Steve began clapping along with a group of other people. 

“Thanks…” He put the microphone back and sat down with Steve. Steve held his hand again, and for a moment almost leaned in for a kiss. 

“That was amazing Bucky, I’m so proud of you.” A few more people spoke and in the middle of one of the speeches, two people sat down next to the two men. It was Clint and Nat. They were also wearing shirts with Bucky’s name on the back. F

“Sorry we’re late,” Nat said in a hushed whisper. 

“You missed Bucky’s speech,” Steve said. 

“What did the lady at the front desk say when you showed up.”

“I swear when she saw Nat she was going to piss herself,” Clint said. Bucky was completely out of this conversation, he was far too focused on the stories. There were people who lost something in a car accident, bombing, shooting, infection, disease, cancer, and all sorts of stuff. It fascinated Bucky. LeAnn came back onto the stage and thanked everyone. 

“Thank you all for sharing. Thank you Daphne, Caroline, William, David, and Bucky. We know how hard it is to share your story. We welcome you all to join us for the walk outside.” Steve saw Clint staring at the stage. 

“Nat what did she say?” Clint whispered with some signing. Nat pushed some of his hair behind his ear, seeing that he wasn’t wearing his hearing aids. Of course he could read lips, but they were pretty far away from the stage. Nat signed the words that leann said. 

“Maybe we could go to a deaf walk sometime,” Bucky signed. Clint smiled. They usually talked to him because he was very good at reading lips, but they didn’t want to make too much noise. 

“You really need to wear these,” She ran her fingers across his ear. When he wore his hearing aids she could whisper into his ear and he would hear it. He loved to hear her voice. 

“You know I hate them, they are too clunky, I told Tony to make me new ones.” Nat rolled her eyes. Bucky and Steve stood up and headed out for the walk. They started walking the track, hand in hand. Nat and Clint walked next to them. They were silent for a while, not saying a word for a few laps. 

“I’m really glad you guys came,” Bucky said. 

“You know that we would, and that Sam would have come if he wasn’t with family,” Steve replied. “I love your arm so much Bucky. I know it’s been through a lot, all of the arms.” Bucky had undergone two operations outside of Hydra to disconnect the arm. The one that was put on in the forties has wired throughout his body, up into his brain. If they took it off, he would bleed out. Cho and Shuri went in and made connecters for the false neurons that made up his arm. That took 12 hours, but left him with an arm that could in theory be taken off. Then he got the new arm in Wakanda that didn’t take an operation to put on. There was another just to repair some of the damages done during the battle. Small, not life threatening. 

“Your arm is beautiful,” Nat said as well. Bucky smiled. He turned his head and there were people cheering them on, cheering everyone on. It was kind of great, everyone was here not just for him but for Daphne and William and LeAnn and everyone who lost something. Bucky leaned over and put his head on Steve’s shoulder. 

“I love you.” 

“Shuri… Steve come today? Am I better?” He was lying in his bed, the IV tape on his hand irritating his skin. His hair was cut just to his jaw. He had been waiting to see Steve since he woke up. It has been… he didn’t remember how many days it had been since he woke up. He had been wrapped in a Wakandan cloth to cover his arm stump. “Shuri?” 

“Yes?”

“Long I be awake? From ice.” 

“Five days. Steve will be coming soon, then you can do your kissing.” She adjusted his bag to get more medicine in him. 

“Why do I don’t have arm?” His motor skills hadn't woken up yet, hence the fact he wasn’t talking right. 

“For your best recovery.” She helped him sit up. He was dressed in the clothes that Steve brought for him and left. Clothes for when he was woken up. Just some of his jeans and shirts, enough to keep him clothed for the time being. He turned to look at the city. He loved the sight of the Wakandan capitol. 

“How tall are the buildings. They are many taller than the ones at home.” He said to Shuri. 

“I don’t know like 1400 feet tall?” 

“That’s a lot more than empire state.” He was so loopy, once they got Winter Soldier out the only stuff left was scraps of Bucky from after ‘45 and all that there was before. Before things start coming back he’s going to think it’s the forties. Shuri’s trying to do damage control for when the moment hits. 

“Sergeant Barnes do you know what year it is?” Shuri asked, sitting opposite him. 

“I don’t… I don’t know. I know where I am. You told me that.” Shuri wrote down that the recent memories hadn’t come back yet. 

“What is your relation to Steven Rogers?” She moved on to her next question. Bucky blushed. 

“He’s my best friend.” He was still blushing. 

“Have you ever had romantic relations with Steven Rogers.” Bucky nodded, blushing like a tomato. 

“Good.” She wrote some more stuff on the papers. She left the room, leaving Bucky by himself in the medium sized room. He put his hand on the bed to get up but fell down. He was laying there, trying to move. He hadn’t figured out how to function with just one arm. He looked for something to do. There were no books by the bed, no pictures, and nothing to do at all. He just lay there, staring at nothing. He was spaced out with no thoughts at all. He didn’t even hear when the door opened. 

“What’s he doing?” 

“Sometimes he just spaces out. Like sleeping but he’s conscious, I’ll wake him up.” Shuri walked over to Bucky’s bed and pressed at his right arm. 

“Sergeant Barnes you have a visitor.” Bucky sat up, Shuri helped him stand up, pulling the IV stand along with him. 

“Steve.” He ran up to him and hugged him. He couldn’t quite run as it was more of a fast scurry. “I miss you.” 

“I missed you too Bucky. It’s been almost a year.” He walked him over to the seating and sat down with him. Shuri gave them some privacy. Steve looked at Bucky again and laid his head down, overwhelmed with emotion. 

“You take home now? Brooklyn?” Steve was crying. He kissed his cheek. 

“Bucky we can’t go home. I’m sorry.” Bucky was confused. He didn’t know why he couldn’t go home to Brooklyn. He sat there holding Steve’s hand. 

“Steve?” 

“Yes Bucky?” 

“What year is it?” Steve put his face in his lover’s shoulder. 

“Buck it’s 2017, you went into the cryo a year ago in 2016.” Steve didn’t know why he was crying. 

“2017? And I was only asleep for a year? You are such a liar!” He was smiling and giving Steve a playful punch on the shoulder. 

“Bucky… do you remember what happened before you came here?” He knew that Bucky wouldn’t remember, he couldn’t remember recent stuff. But the silver lining is, for the time being, he doesn’t remember The Winter Soldier. But then again, he doesn’t remember the recent Bucky. “Do you remember why you don’t have an arm?” 

“I’m sorry Steve I don’t remember yet. Maybe Shuri can tell you, she’s really nice.” Steve was still crying and Bucky was still smiling. 

“Bucky I’m going to stay with you for a week and then I have to go. You can’t come with me, I’m really really sorry. We’re both kinda wanted, but I do get to stay with you for a little bit.” He stroked Bucky’s cheek. 

“Can I kiss you?” Bucky asked. 

“Of course,” Steve whispered and Bucky leaned in for a kiss right on his lips. A tear fell down Steve’s cheek. It was the first time they had kissed in a very long time. He had waited for this. He waited for this for so long. 

“ I want to remember.”


	6. sase

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Thanksgiving at Avengers tower and Bucky is bringing the mash potatoes. Stories are told, and secrets revealed. Bucky remembers something from many years ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! I am working on a full fic that takes place in Steve and Bucky's childhood, so updates on this won't come as quickly.

“Steve this recipe makes no sense, why the hell would I put the custard in the mash potatoes?” 

“Buck flip the page.” 

“Oh.” He turned the page to his recipe. It must have flipped over. They love spending Thanksgiving together. Not just together, but with their whole family. In the big dining room at Avengers Compound, they all pile in. Tony, Pepper, Peter, Thor, Frigga, Loki, Pietro, Wanda, Vision, and everyone else. They are all in charge of bringing something. This year Bucky has mashed potatoes and Steve has his famous angel food cake. He is always exempt from the random drawing in the same way that Wanda is because she makes one hell of a paprikash. 

“I’m finished!” He showed Steve his large container full of mashed potatoes. Steve was not yet done. He was barely started. It didn’t quite matter, the dinner started at noon and it was eight, but everyone was there an hour early. Bucky walked over to help his favorite guy with the cake. 

“Honey can you measure out the flour, it says it right there.” He kissed Bucky’s cheek and measured sugar. Bucky grabbed a measuring cup and measured the flour. He mixed it in and ran his flour soaked hands up Steve’s side. He nipped at his neck. “We don’t have ti-ime for this now BuCKY.” Bucky pulled away once Steve was done moaning like a cow. He mixed in the wet ingredients. He poured the mushy mix into the cake pan, then putting it in the oven. He sat on the counter. 

“We have 30 minutes before the cake is done,” Bucky said, putting his hands on Steve’s thighs. Steve jumped from the counter and got on his knees. Not what Bucky was expecting, but when life gives you lemons or in this scenario a blowjob. 

“That cake looks so good.” 

“I’m sure you’re pretty hungry after that….” He tossed an apple to Bucky while popping a breath mint for himself. Bucky chowed down on his snack while packing up the potatoes. 

“We should probably go now, get there early.” Steve grabbed his cake and Bucky his potatoes. They took a cab to the compound and the elevator to the residential floor. They shared the elevator with Vision. 

“Viz why the hell would you use the elevator, you can phase through walls.” 

“Miss Maximoff wants me to learn how to be more human. As does Mr. Stark.” Bucky nodded. 

“I mean you’re not human, you’re just Vision. You don’t have to be anything else. Just don’t phase through walls into people’s private rooms, that made quite the incident I hope you don’t remember.” He was shuddering from recalling the time that Vision phased through their bedroom wall when they were having some ‘special time’. They yelled at him after covering with the blanket. 

“I do remember as I can not forget anything. I remember every detail. Quite vividly.” Steve buried his face in his hands, shaking his head. The elevator beeped. They were there. They walked into the residential floor and heard the music blaring throughout the rooms. 

“GRANDPA LOVERS ARE HERE!” Someone shouted. Most likely Nat. They walked into the dining room with a long table and put their food down. Bucky walked into the kitchen first, finding Pepper and Wanda. The boys hadn’t seen Pepper in a while, so it came as quite a shock when her stomach came into view. 

“Oh my god you’re a blimp,” Bucky said without thinking. 

“You know how to make a woman feel good Barnes, and I’m about ready to pop so she’s pretty big.” 

“She?” Bucky’s voice was shaky. 

“I still don’t know, but I have a mother’s intuition.” She tapped her temple. 

“Do you have a name?” Bucky picked up an apron and started helping the girls make some food. 

“Morgan. Tony loves it and I love that it’s gender-neutral, but you and I know.” She handed him the salt. 

“I like that name.” 

Meanwhile, Steve was searching for the source of the blasting music. He ended up in Clint’s room. He had a pitbull CD all the way up. He was laying on the ground, sprawled. This isn't the first time Steve has seen this. Clint will lie on the ground, feeling the vibrations of the music. He does this a lot. Man is a big fan of Pitbull. 

“HI CLINT!” He screamed. Didn’t flinch. He lay next to him and tapped his shoulder. He signed hello. Clint signed back hi. 

“The music is pretty loud!” he yelled while signing. 

“Didn’t notice,” Clint said back, also yelling. He sat up and put his hearing aids in, turning the music back down. 

“Shit, these things really do work wonders.” He adjusted them as he got off of the floor. 

“How you been buddy?” Steve asked. He like checking up on people, especially his friends. He sat down on his couch. He doesn’t stay here too much, but it is still decorated the way you would expect it to be. On the wall hung his vintage bows. He had pictures of him and Nat up on the walls. They were in the process of moving out as well. They were getting a place in the East Village. Stark was once again happy to be moving someone out. It wasn’t in the way of a parent whose child has been living in the house for 26 years but someone who is glad someone found safety. Tony is just happy that she can leave the house without being attacked or harassed. 

“I’ve been good.” He started walking out of the room. They were signing a conversation about nothing. Just random talk about Nat and Thanksgiving. And of course his angel cake.

“That cake is a gift from the heavens,” Clint said. They got to the big common room that was housing everyone. And by everyone it is everyone. Pepper was out of the kitchen and was now on the couch next to her husband. Tony was rubbing her stomach. Steve strutted up to Nat and leaned into her ear. 

“Nat I need to talk to you, urgent.” She followed him into a closet. It was a very large closet but still. He pulled out his phone and showed her a document. 

“I found Becca.” Her hand went to her mouth. 

“No…” 

“I did. It took forever, years of work. Suprisingly this woman is hard to track. She’s been everywhere. And records aren’t that good for rural Indiana. I suspected that she was living in her parent's house in Brooklyn, but that place was torn down ages ago. So I turned to Indiana. That was where their grandparents are from. She’s still there. In a little township outside of Shelbyville. 

“Oh my god. I never thought. I assumed she died,” Nat said. She looked at the information. “She’s in a nursing home?” 

“Yes, she’s 89. Her husband died two years ago. Man, this internet has a lot of stuff about people on it.” Nat chuckled. Someone was yelling from the living room. 

“Steve!” It was Bucky. They couldn’t tell him about this. He hasn’t spoken of his sister in a very long time. He has always assumed that his family was long gone, but Steve has a small surprise. Sometime he’ll take him to Indiana so he can see her again. She probably doesn’t know he’s alive either. 

“We should go, don’t let him get suspicious.” He winked and left the closet. Nat followed him a little bit later. He met up with Bucky in the sitting room. 

“We’re going to start setting the table now.” He drug him into the dining room to start putting plates down. All the food was put on the table and everyone sat down. At the front of the table were Tony, Pepper, and Rhodey. Next to them was the Maximoff clan and then the Asgardians, Frigga, Loki, Thor, and Val. At the end of the table was Banner, Strange, and Wong. On the other side of the table sat the Pyms, Nat, Clint, Sam, Steve, and Bucky. Next to them were two empty seats. 

“Who’s missing?” Scott asked. He gestured to the empty seats next to Tony. 

“Pete, the kid is always late.” Pepper elbowed him. A couple of seconds later Peter walked into the room with his hand interlaced with a girl. She had curly brown hair and dark skin, she was wearing a floral dress with combat boots. 

“Hi guys, this is Michelle. She’s my girlfriend. Michelle these are the guys and girls. Do you want me to introduce everyone?” She shrugged. 

“I mean I know some of you. Thor, Tony Stark, Pepper Potts, Captain America, and that guy that terrorized New York but other than that…” Loki slumped into his seat, his mother patting his shoulder. Peter began walking around the table. 

“This is Tony, Pepper, Rhodey, Wanda, Vision-” He patted each person on the head as he named them. “- Pietro, Frigga, Loki, Thor, Val short for Valkyrie. Then we have Bruce, Doctor Strange, and Mr. Wong. And now we have Hank, Janet, Hope, Scott, and Cassie. Then Nat, Clint, and Sam. And then to finish we have the grandpas Steve and Bucky.” Steve laughed but Bucky just scoffed. He had a love-hate relationship with people calling him grandpa. Peter pulled a chair out for Michelle and she sat down, right next to Steve. 

“Hi. My name’s Steve. Pete’s a good kid, you picked a good guy,” Steve said to Michelle. 

“I know who you are, there’s these detention videos. I’m Michelle, but Peter already said that, my friends call me MJ.” Steve made a mental note to ask about these videos after they started eating. Tony stood up and dinged his spoon against a glass. 

“Welcome to thanksgiving 2021! I welcome everyone here especially the newbies Hank, Janet, and MJ. I know the Pyms had some doubts about coming, but we have a great time with friends, family, and food. As per tradition we will go around the table saying what we are thankful for. I will start. I am so thankful for my amazing wife and unborn child who I love so much.” Pepper was smiling so wide. She began to say what she was thankful for. 

“I don’t mean to say what Tony said, but I am thankful for my husband and that we have an amazing life with amazing friends that we can raise Morgan in.” Tony held her hand over the table. Rhodey went next. 

“I am thankful for my ever improving health and great doctors.” Everyone was smiling, even Bucky. Even if he was hesitant to smile to things that weren’t Steve, the thankful talk always made him soft. 

“I am thankful for my family, not just Pierto and Viz but all of you,” Wanda said. She passed it onto Vision.

“I am thankful for Banner, Stark, and Wanda for teaching me about being thankful and especially Wanda for teaching me about love.” An ‘aw’ could be heard from somewhere at the table. No one could pinpoint where it came from. She passed onto her brother. 

“I am thankful for freedom and health.” Standard answer but sufficient for everything he went through. “What are the asgardians thankful for?” Pierto said. 

“I’ll start,” Loki said. “I’m thankful for the same thing I’m thankful for every year. I’m thankful for forgiveness. As you all know I haven’t been a model citizen my whole life and you guys gave me another family once mine was stripped of everything.” Frigga took his hand in a comforting motion. 

“I am thankful for my sons who have fought everything to keep our family and this family safe,” Frigga said. Thor was the one smiling now. 

“I am full of thanks for all of the asgardians who have helped us rebuild in the land of the Norse.” Sam snorts of laughter. Steve gives him a look. 

“Val? What are you thankful for?” Tony asked. 

“I’m thankful for all of the Asgardians, and for our King and Queen.” She took a sip of her drink. 

“I am thankful for all of the little things in life that keep me going,” Bruce said. He had been struggling with his own mental health for a while and was trying to become someone for himself. Steve didn’t know too much, but they had some talks on occasion. 

“I’m thankful for peace, we haven’t had an attack in a couple years and I’m very thankful,” Strange said. A few were surprised that he didn’t say the ‘mystic arts’ Wong spoke next. 

“I am thankful for my life in the spiritual realm which only grows.” There it was. 

“I am thankful for connecting with Mr. Stark again after our troubling history,” Hank said. Tony responded with a welcoming message. They were both hesitant about reconnecting after everything that Hank and Howard went through. “Janet dear, what are you thankful for.” 

“I am thankful for family and our reconnection a few years ago. I have been living a better life ever since.” Everyone was so happy. It was the happiest you would see a group of traumatized people. 

“I think that both me and Scott are thankful for our relationship and our lovely daughter who even through the teenage years is amazing.” 

“She’s right, I’m thankful for Cassie. I’ve committed myself to never missing her grow up ever again. I missed the baby stage and I definitely don’t want to miss the teen years.” Clint and Nat went next. They were thankful for family, love, and hearing aids. Regular stuff. 

“I’m thankful for Steve and doctors and therapists who help me through all the shit that’s in my head. I’m thankful for T’challa who cannot be here today, because I don’t know where I would be without him.” Steve was holding his hand under the table. 

“I’m thankful for all of you, Bucky, and Tob- Alpine. And I am thankful for everyone who has been accepting of us. MJ? What are you thankful for?” Steve asked, trying to be as calm as possible because how chill can a person be when your boyfriend brings you to thanksgiving with all the avengers. 

“I’m thankful for my awesome boyfriend who has kept us from all dying on multiple school trips and for all of you guys who have stopped us from dying like a lot.” She nudged Peter with her shoulder. 

“I’m thankful for Tony and Pepper and May, who isn’t here today because of her job, and of course MJ for making this year amazing and a great first year in college!” He made a sarcastic yay. 

“Thank you guys for sharing now let’s dig in. Drinks are right here and the no drink list this year is Peter, MJ, and James Buchanen Barnes. If I catch any of you sneaking a sip you will get a stern talking to from Steve, or in Barnes’ case from me.” Bucky frowned. He loved some wine of Thanksgiving, but having a stroke did put some restrictions on what you can do. Tony began to speak again, “Perhaps we should start oldest to youngest and this is my way of telling Peter to tell me about his girlfriends.” Peter scoffed and Thor and Bucky cheered. 

“On Asgard I am thousands of years old.” 

“Yeah but how old are you in earth years?” Loki asked, because this is earth and we measure in earth years. 

“Like 22…” 

“WOOHOO I WIN!” Bucky shouted and began to get his food. Steve followed with Frigga up next. Hank, Janet, and everyone else followed. 

“So what were you referring on these videos?” Steve asked MJ. 

“There’s the detention one that if you get detention Captain America tells you to think about what you did.” She pulled out her phone and showed him one of the videos. 

“Steve what the hell did you do? Did you make these?” He asked MJ. He was so befuddled by the videos. Did someone animate this? Does someone in this country look exactly like him and was paid to lecture children? 

“I sadly did not make these, there is also the Captain America Fitness Challenge that we are required to do in PE.” She showed him this video as well. Bucky was laughing his ass off at these. 

“Buck I swear these aren’t me. But like what the hell are they?” He held the phone and looked closely. It barely even sounded like him. 

“I will personally say that coming back from Germany and having to watch these was the weirdest thing ever.” Peter said while eating spoonful of green beans. His plate was completely full of food. 

“Pete I understand that your metabolism is off the charts, but you are a pig,” Tony said pointing to the kid’s plate. He was similar to Steve and Bucky in that he was different on the inside and everything was pumped to the max. Peter’s vision went from needing bifocal glasses to having the sharpest vision any optometrist has ever seen. He went from not being able to do one pull up to being able to do fifty without breaking a sweat. And he’s always hungry. His body needs so much food to be normal. Just like Steve. Looking at Peter’s plate Steve said,

“You know kid, we are pretty much the same person except you are 20 and I am 103 years old.” MJ laughed at him. Or as she would say, with him. Peter continued to scarf down all of his food as Tony watched in awe. 

“So how is pregnancy going Mrs. Stark?” Frigga asked, eyeing her bump. “I remember being pregnant with that rascal and his sister, oh she was a kicker. Explains a lot doesn’t it boys.” She laughed. “Thor though, all of my friends thought that he would be a girl. A nice dainty one unlike his sister who threw the most unbearable tantrums. But then this golden haired little boy came out. Quite the miracle. And then Odin brought home this raven haired boy with green eyes and I asked, ‘oh my I haven’t had another one have I?’ Oh it was hilarious. Too bad you don’t remember it.” She elbowed her sons in the side. She loved to tease them. And now that the destruction of Asgard was years in the past she could joke about her daughter without hesitation. 

“Oh mother… I always wondered why Loki and I looked so different. Until we found out father’s first little secret.” Frigga rolled her eyes and turned back to Pepper. 

“Oh the pregnancy has been a bumpy road. First four months I was always sick. Everyone calls it morning sickness but the only time I wasn’t throwing up was when I was asleep. Tony had a fun time there-” She laughed. 

“Oh the same thing happened to me when I was expecting Hope! I could only eat-” 

“Pickles!” They said at the same time, laughing. Tony and Hank looked at eachother sympathetically. 

“The next couple of months were fine until they started kicking in there. Little rascal never seems to sleep. I hope they aren’t nocturnal when they come out too!” She looked nervous. But who wouldn’t be, she’s having a baby. Something that always fascinated Steve, in the forties he saw some of his friends with their kids. Like little versions of themselves. It was something that he thought he wanted, until everything changed. But now he is going to be the best godfather to this kid. 

“Now I’m at the home stretch, could come anytime now. And if Tony would finish the nursery I would stop stressing about everything.” Her voice became more and more angry as she continued. 

“At least I could write off her mood swings as ‘part of the pregnancy’ for the past nine months,” Tony said getting a well earned punch in the side by his wife. 

“How’s life been for you boys?” Pepper said, motioning to Bucky and Steve.

“Oh my. Well after Bucky’s little incident after Greenland we have done a lot of sit down and rest time which is not a euphemism for what I know you are thinking about.” Tony laughed. “We spent his post stroke house arrest watching documentaries about ourselves and The Wizard of Oz. in case you were wondering.” 

“You guys are so old,” Tony said, something he always loves to point out. 

“We are aware.” Steve laughed and continued eating and drinking some white wine. Bucky was eyeing his glass while sipping his water. He really wanted some of that. 

“Mother are you proud of me? I left Mjolnir in the broom closet this year,” Thor said, pointing to the empty area by his chair. Loki pat his back. 

“You are so grown up brother,” Loki said sarcastically. Frigga smiled. 

“That thing is the worst thing to trip over I will let you know,” Clint said. Every avenger had at least one experience running into it. Terrifying. 

The whole team continued eating and laughing. Telling stories and funny experiences. Peter told an entire saga about how he hid his suits from his roommate. But if he had hid it from his aunt for so long, he could definitely hide it from his roommate. Tony had to remind him that he could live with him at the compound or tower, but he refused. 

Bucky was still eyeing Steve’s wine. Steve rolled his eyes and gestured for Bucky to lower his glass. He poured some of his wine into Bucky’s glass. Bucky leaned over to give steve a little kiss on the cheek. 

“Ew, grandpas kissing,” Clint said. Bucky slid him a little gesture, not letting the kid see. Clint reciprocated the gesture. Steve was not pleased. 

More time went on, Bucky got no more wine. He was on the no-alcohol list after all. The pie was taken out, and eaten quickly. They all cleaned up, and that means everyone. 

“We’re going to move to the common room to watch some traditional Thanksgiving viewing material. Our suggestions this year came from Peter, Steve, and Vision? Viz what did you suggest?” 

“I suggested the pooh film, it is appealing to ages young and old. And we have all ages at this event.” Wanda rolled her eyes and patted him on the back. They filed into the sitting room. Steve and Bucky shared a chair. Steve was practically on his lap. They began watching Steve’s favorite Thanksgiving film since he got out of ice ten years ago. A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving. They were all watching intently, those who grew up with the film along with those who didn’t. 

“Meet me in the broom closet in five minutes, I have something to show you.” Steve whispered in Bucky’s ear. The dark haired man was instantly excited. Steve left his lap. Bucky waited intently for five minutes before getting up and going to the closet. He knocked on the door before coming in. 

“What did you want to show me?” He stroked Steve’s cheek and ran his hand down his muscular chest. 

“This,” Steve said pulling Thor’s hammer out from behind his back. At first Bucky didn’t understand. He saw the mark of Odin shining on the side and understood. 

“Holy shit. Holy shit. How…. But Thor said…. When did you find out you could do this?” 

“I found out a couple days before we fought Ultron. We had a party and were debating if we could lift it. We all tried. When I went to life it, the hammer moved. So I left it there and acted like I couldn’t get it up. Later I tried to pick it up and….” He moved the hammer in his hands. 

“We should take it home,” Bucky said. Steve looked at him with shock. Steve nodded and opened the bag that they brought the food in. It slipped in perfectly. He smiled at Bucky and they left the closet. 

“Did you boys have fun?” Tony said. Steve could not tell if he was being sarcastic or not. 

“I was just in the bathroom,” Bucky said. Tony didn’t buy it, but let it go. 

After another few hours they were back at home and almost had forgotten about their secret. Until Bucky went to pick up their bag and it wouldn’t budge an inch. Steve winked and picked it up like a feather. Bucky rolled his eyes. 

“Where are we going to keep it? Thor is bound to get suspicious eventually,” Bucky said. Steve carried it to their room and put it on the chair. 

“She will sit right here, and you and I will sit here.” He brought him to sit on the bed. They sat criss cross in front of one another. 

“What do you want Steve?” 

“I want to know how you are doing,” He said. “I want you to know how much you are loved, and how much I care.” Bucky dipped his head into Steve’s neck. He wasn’t crying, but those words coming from Steve’s mouth made him feel something. 

“I...I’m okay, I guess. I don’t know… I haven’t had a panic attack in a few days. I haven’t had a seizure either so…. That’s good?” Steve held his hand. He kissed his cheek. 

“That’s great baby, how have you really been feeling? Have you been depressed, suicidal?” He started stroking Bucky’s long hair. He started carelessly braiding it. 

“I… I couldn’t do that Steve. I could never do that to you.” He leaned into him again. 

“Bucky? Oh ...” He realized that Bucky remembered. They had all read the documents about him. The ones that came from Hydra. There were so many documented times that he took his knife to himself. When he had to be restrained and electrocuted for it. So many times… 

“Bucky, baby, don’t cry. I know...I know…” He stroked his hair and cheek. He felt his pain. Bucky had to have remembered. And of all things that he could have remembered.

“I only remember once… It was close to the beginning. They were making me fight, telling me that I this was my purpose. They only called me soldier and asset. I had the knife in my hand. I snapped. That happened some then. I would be completely gone and then remember. I would remember….. You. I couldn’t do it anymore. I just couldn’t so ...so ...” He couldn’t go on. He was fully weeping. 

“Shh… I didn’t mean to.” He lay down with him. He put his arms around Bucky. It was what he needed anytime his bad memories came back. There was the incident a month ago when he began thrashing in the night. He remembered one of his surgeries. Steve held him tight. He gave him all of the warmth he had to offer. 

“I’m right here, When you wish upon a star, doesn’t matter who you are. Anything your heart desires will come to you…” Steve continued to sing. Bucky fell asleep in his arms. Steve picked him up and tucked him in. He kissed the man’s forehead. 

“I guess the lullabies worked perfectly.” Steve said, taking off his shirt and getting into the bed. He lay awake. His eyes not wanting to close. All he could do was watch the soft rise and fall of Bucky’s chest. Steve lay his head upon his chest and closed his eyes. 

And all was peaceful.


	7. sapte

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve wakes up to an empty bed, and this time Bucky isn't on a grocery run for milk. It brings him to a field in Indiana where his life changes forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end, guys! The Future is ending but do not fear, I am working on two more fics right now. One of them is an au that takes place right after tws. The other is a (so far) canon-compliant fic that takes place in Bucky and Steve's childhood.

Everything felt peaceful. Steve has the best night in a long time. He was ready to roll over and give Bucky a nice good morning blowjob. He rolled over and was met by an empty pillow. That bastard didn’t even wake him before he went on a run, Steve thought. He got out of bed and went to the bathroom to shave.

“Bucky? Are you out?” He yelled throughout the house. There was no response. He rolled his eyes at Bucky’s six am runs. He shaved his stubbly chin, relishing in the smoothness of the cream. We never had this smelly stuff back then, sometimes we just used water. Steve thought. He left the bathroom yawning. For being a super-soldier he was still very tired all the time. He yawned again before tripping.

“Shit!” He landed face-first on the ground. He picked up the blasted object that caused his demise. A running shoe.

“What the hell?” He picked up the shoes that should be on someone’s feet right now. He didn’t think much, Bucky usually went out for milk at random hours of the day. But he walked into the living room to see Bucky’s other shoes. Bucky never goes anywhere barefoot. He complains too much about the rocks. Spoiled, because in the thirties they never wore shoes.

After a couple more minutes Steve started to get worried. Bucky usually woke him up if he decided to go anywhere. He grabbed his phone and messaged Tony.

-Bucky isn’t here. His shoes are still here.

-What do you want me to do abt it?

-I don’t know. I’m just worried. Do we still have that tracker in his arm?

-It’s been off for years I’ll turn it on

-thank you. I’m sure you know my worries.

-I’m sure he’s fine.

Tony Stark is offline

Steve took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. He went to text Bucky but realized that his phone was still sitting on the bedside table.

“Shit,” Steve said. He grabbed his shield and bag, taking off to the tower. He tried to find anything along the sidewalk that could prove what went on here. He saw no blood, but HYDRA isn’t sloppy about things. He began running, sprinting to the tower. He got in the elevator, going to Tony’s lab.

“Tony I think they took him.”

“So do I,” he replied. Running his hands through his hair as he looked at the screens his stress was visible.

“Could you find a signal?”

“Yeah, he’s near Virginia right now, but going very fast. I could get into the vitals and they are very slow. Most likely he was drugged unconscious. I’m sending out a message to all police of the east coast and for the team to suit up. We’ll get him.” Steve blinked away tears and went to suit up.

They were all in the locker room now, everyone suiting up. Steve was surprised to see Thor and Loki grabbing their weapons.

“Hey guys,” Steve said sheepishly.

“Steve, I’m super sorry. We got a location on him. We’ll get him,” Nat said. She was dressed in her catsuit. She put a coat and skirt over top for some cover. They didn’t think that groundwork would be needed, but no one could be sure. Steve strapped his shield on his back and strutted out of the room.

“We need to go, they’ve crossed another state line. The helicopter is in West Virginia now,” Tony said. He met them at the hanger for the quinjet.

“Helicopter?”

“Based on the speed that he’s moving, I think that he’s in a helicopter or a small plane. We need to go now. Get on the jet. Banner’s coming on stand-by.” Steve nodded and got on the jet. Tony took the wheel, telling Steve that he was too stressed to be flying it.

“Just take it easy and keep an eye on those recordings of his arm. Thank God for that thing,” Tony said and Steve took the order. He looked at the map of where the tracker was taking him. Tony started up the quinjet and began going at lightning speed.

“They’ve crossed into eastern Ohio. They may be going to Indiana.”

“What’s in Indiana, except for meth labs?” Nat said, making Steve laugh.

“Indiana flies under the radar and… Nat, Becca lives in Indiana. Oh my God, what if they’re going for Becca?”

“Why would they need her?” Steve didn’t know this either, but they wanted their soldier back. Somehow they found Bucky and have him. But they are coming for HYDRA, or Zemo, or whoever took him. Most likely HYDRA, because who wouldn’t miss their greatest killing machine.

“We’ve crossed West Virginia border. We are nearing the plane. The east and midwest have released emergency warnings for a man in his early thirties with shoulder-length brown hair and a prosthetic metal arm. We haven’t gotten any tips yet. But we have a tracker on him. It’s okay Steve you can calm down,” Tony said.

“I’m perfectly calm,” he said while his hands were shaking. After a couple more minutes they crossed Ohio and could see a blip on their radar.

“That’s them, it matches up with the trackings. Follow it,” Steve said. Tony put the jet into stealth mode. Unable to be detected. Only a few moments later they had a visual as the helicopter was slowing down. It landed in the middle of an empty cornfield in Indiana. They landed a couple of miles away. Steve went first with Natasha to observe how many they had to deal with.

Once they reached the field that the HYDRA ship was landed on, and they had confirmed it was HYDRA, they saw Bucky in an enclosed case. It was almost the exact one he was kept in while in Germany. He was obviously unconscious, and Steve could tell without looking at his vital signs. Someone came in and gave him an injection in the right arm five seconds later he woke up with a jolt. Steve gritted his teeth. Bucky was clamped down and tried to fight it, but gave up quickly.

“Can you hear them?” Nat asked. Steve nodded and listened.

“Hello, soldier. You have been gone for a very long time, but we have a mission for you.”

“I’m not your soldier,” Bucky said in a strong voice. It had taken Steve this time to realize that Bucky was still in his pajamas. Gym shorts and a T-shirt.

“Oh, but you are. You were born our soldier. You were born to bring order. And order means peace, but peace comes at a cost.”

“I don’t do this anymore. You don’t have my mind anymore.”

“Желание. Семнадцать. Ржавый.” As he began to speak Bucky kept a straight face. Steve, on the other hand, was terrified. He continued, “Рассвет. Печь. Девять. Добросердечный.” Bucky still had no response. No change in expression. The agent continued reading in a more aggressive tone, “ Возвращение на родину. Один. Товарный вагон.” Bucky did not move.

“Soldat?”

“Like I told you, my mind is my own now.” He punched the door down with his metal arm and began to fight off the HYDRA agents. Steve and Nat busted in and fought off the rest of them.

“I’m so proud of you dearest,” Steve said as he flew his shield into the leg of a HYDRA operative. He kicked him in the chest.

“I guess old T’Challa did more on me than I thought. And of course, you,” Bucky flashed his eyes while killing the agents brutally. Suddenly more dropped down from a helicopter than hadn’t detected. At the same time, the rest of the team came in. Tony began blasting them with the iron man suit. Thor summoned some lighting to kill some of them. Steve shielded Bucky to run into the helicopter and grab the files, or anything that they could find.

“Bucky I’m so sorry. I should have been awake. I should have heard something.”

“Stevie, don’t you realize that they probably drugged you too?” Steve didn’t actually think about this. He was far too focused on the fact that he missed Bucky being knocked out and kidnapped.

Steve convinced Tony a few weeks earlier they needed to stop killing all of the HYDRA they find. So they began to take in more prisoners for questioning.

They finished, getting the guy that was attempting to trigger Bucky and some other agents along with the documents.

“You guys coming?” Steve shook his head.

“We have business here.” Bucky gave him a confused look. Nat smiled and nodded.

“I would like my clothes though, and Bucky might need some clothes too.” Tony rolled his eyes and opened one of the drawers, throwing them some clothes, clean. Steve smiled. “Can you take us to this address, or close to it?” He showed Tony an address and he nodded. They sat down in the seats, Steve’s hand in Bucky’s.

“Where are we going?” Bucky asked. Steve just squeezed his hand and smiled.

“You are a mysterious man.” He winked and held the hand back.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

“Bucky I told you that I can’t stay here. There are these laws and… both of us have broken them.”

“But Steve, why can’t you just stay with me in the countryside with the goats?” Steve put his head in Bucky’s shoulder. He was crying. “Stevie don’t cry, I love you.” That only made Steve cry more.

“Bucky I just can’t stay now. You are going to the country so you can heal, but I need to help other people. With Sam and Nat. You remember Sam and Nat?” Bucky nodded.

“I have a sister.”

“Excuse me? What was that?” Steve asked.

“I remember something. I have a sister, she’s younger. Her hair… it’s curly.” He smiled just like he did when he remembered Steve’s little habits.

“You do have a sister, I met her. Her name is-”

“Becca.” Steve was the one smiling now. He didn’t think that Bucky would remember her. Rebecca Barnes.

“I wonder whatever happened to her?” Steve genuinely didn’t know. The last time he saw her was at Bucky’s funeral in 1945.

“I don’t know, Bucky. I’m going to help you get settled in, and then say goodbye.” Bucky nodded and left the car. They were in a small Wakandan village, full of farmers and children. There was a family waiting for them outside of the car. They were dressed in the traditional clothing of the village.

“Hello, White Wolf. I am Anathai and these are my children Cebisa and Khwezi. You will be staying in one of our huts. We are glad to welcome you to our village.” Steve understood none of this, as they were speaking mainly in Xhosa. Bucky laughed and translated. Anathai moved out of the way and her young girl Cebisa. She was holding a folded set of clothing.

“These are for you Mr. White Wolf,” she said in English. He took the clothing with his right hand. The other side of him was covered in a cloth. They followed the family to a small hut made of thatch and earth.

“It’s nice. Probably nicer than my old apartment.” Steve chuckled, remembering the sad apartment in Bucharest. The one tiny room and mattress on the floor. Of course, it was not as nice as the Wakandan palace, but he had a bed and a table. There was a large basin on one side and the floors had wooden planks across them.

“Would you like to meet our village?” the young boy asked. Bucky nodded and followed Khwezi to the village center. There were mothers, fathers, grandparents, and children. Bucky met them all and introduced himself. Steve couldn’t have been prouder.

\- - - - - - - - - - - - -  
“Stevie why the hell are we at a nursing home. Have you finally decided to get rid of me?” Steve laughed.

“It’s a surprise.” He led him inside and asked Bucky to wait while they got visitors passes. Steve knew exactly where he was going. They went to room 114. Bucky was still so very confused.

“Is anyone home?” Steve said. A woman with wrinkled skin and dyed brown hair turned to them. She looked for a moment in disbelief.

“James?” Bucky didn’t recognize the face for a moment. He didn’t recognize his sister was standing in front of him. He looked for a minute before he realized.

“Becca?” She nodded and they enveloped each other in hugs.

“I didn’t think it could be true. I heard your name in the papers but couldn’t understand. You’re here. You’re really here.” They were both crying their eyes out.

“Becky I thought you were long gone. You’ve grown up.” He held her face as they swayed in the room. Steve looked around the room and saw pictures of Bucky from his war days and his childhood.

“You’ve barely changed. I never knew how that happened,” she said. Bucky hadn’t had to explain how he didn’t age to someone he knew except for Steve. Well, Steve found out on his own

“The Reds. They used me as some kind of soldier. Kept me in this kind of freezer when they didn’t need me,” Bucky said. She only hugged him again.

“I’m so sorry Buck. Will you sit down?” She motioned to her little sitting-room. The two men took a seat.

“Nothing more about me. Tell me how your life went,” Bucky said. Steve wiped a tear away from his love’s eye.

“Well after you died I was only 17. I met Timothy, my lovely Timothy Procter. We got married two years later. He was such an amazing man. He served in the war as well. Just when he turned eighteen he enlisted. I was twenty one when I had my first baby, a girl. We named her Patty, Patricia. Our second, we named him James Buchanan.” Bucky smiled

“Really?” He was so surprised by it. She picked up a stack of photographs. Some were in black and white while some were in color.

“This is him when he was just born. This is his second birthday. This is when he graduated from high school, this his college graduation, this is his wedding, and this is my first grandchild.” Bucky looked at the photos while his tears painted his cheeks.

“I have a nephew and a niece and great-nephews and nieces.” He couldn’t believe.

“I’m sorry I didn’t say hello. It’s nice to see you again Steve. It’s been a long time. So how have you and Bucky been, in your relationship, of course? I read the papers.” Bucky blushed a dark red. He didn’t know that Becca found out.

“We’re doing very well.”

“So… when am I going to see a ring on this finger.” She held up Bucky’s hand. Steve put his hand over his mouth, he was the one blushing now.

“Oh you never know, but you will definitely be the first to know. Can I meet James? Can I meet my great-great nephews?” Steve was smiling ear to ear.

“Of course, I will message them now.” She picked up a phone and texted them. “They’re coming.” Bucky smiled and kept looking at the pictures.

“Who is this?” He pointed to a color photograph of a baby.

“That’s Rebecca, James’ son’s daughter. She was born in 2005. Such a bright young girl.” She showed him more photos of them. “They had another, George and Maria that is. They had a little boy two years later, they named him Henry. Oh, they’ll be here in just a few moments. I didn’t tell them that it was you”

“You scandalous girl.” He nudged her in the side.

They sat chatting for a few moments until the door was knocked. Bucky’s eyes widened.

“Grandma Becca? Can we come in? A young man’s voice said. She opened the door.

“James, I want you to meet your namesake. My brother.” He was just as surprised. Bucky stood up to shake his hand. The old man looked as though he had seen a ghost. But in a way he had

“This is my son George and his kids Henry and Rebecca.”

“So you are my great-great niece and nephew. It’s so nice to meet you.”

They spent the rest of that day with family. Bucky’s old and new family. He always felt so alone. Like all that was left was him, but he has an entire biological family out there. He has two families. Rebecca and Steve. They are his everything.

“Bucky… I have something to give you. If you want Steve here for this. But after Mother and Father died, I inherited their rings. Timothy proposed to me with Mother’s and he had father’s. But Timothy is not here anymore. I want to give them to you.”

“Thank you. I know Father would have wanted this.” He took the gold band into his hand. He looked into Steve’s eyes.

“I guess this is the best time as any,” Bucky said. He got down on one knee. Steve was so oblivious to everything that he didn’t even see this coming.

“Stevie. I’ve known you since before Becca was even born. I think you were even home when the birth happened-” They both laughed through tears. Everyone stood by and watched this. “You made my life more complete. I couldn’t have lived without you. Steve, I want to be one with you. I want to be with you for the rest of my life. So Steve Rogers, will you marry me?” Steve brought him to stand and kissed him with all of the passion in the world and all of the love in their hearts.

“Yes, of course, I will marry you. And I have a ring of my own.” He reached into his shirt and pulled out a necklace. The necklace had two rings. One of a female and one of a man. “My parents, I want you to wear one.” He removed the necklace and his father’s ring, placing it on Bucky’s finger.

“I will be the first to say, congratulations from your baby sister.” She got up to hug the newly engaged couple. Everyone else said their congratulations. “But I would like to hear this story of when Mother gave birth while you were home!”

“Oh it was a beautiful day and I and Bucky were playing games in his room….” He continued to tell stories with his new family. And Bucky thought for the first time, _maybe the future isn’t so bad after all_.


End file.
